Not only do I wake up in the small hours and lie awake worrying about my operation - and whether it has been postponed or not - but its now getting into my dreams.
I dreamt last night that I was in my bedroom in Saudi - or at any rate it wasn't my bedroom here. Captain B was there and some friends and our Saudi neighbour. They were all telling me to stop worrying and to get back to sleep. But we couldn't work out how to get the dark on the outside back into the room.
Then I had one of those Eureka! moments. It was rather like when that apple fell on Einstein's head, stunning him and causing him to come up with his theory of relativity. ("If only that apple had fallen on one of my relatives instead, I wouldn't have this headache".) I realised that if I turned off my bedside light, I would bring the dark back into the room. And the rest was darkness.
It has been a hot start to Autumn. Very hot yesterday. Dorothy O'South Island arrives today, and Jackie is joining us tomorrow for a Thai takeaway.
The meeting at the Kingdom Hall on Sunday calmed me down so much. Jehovah is rightly called "the God of all comfort". Mick gave the talk, about continuing to look forward to the restored earthly Paradise. Various people have rung, including Bea, to ask about the situation re the op but I still have no idea when it is to be.
And yet I tell myself what a spoilt first-world worry this is to have. And how amazing to be living in a window of time when I have this to worry about. Not only do we have the technology, but we also, for the moment, have the NHS.
But then that gives me an extra worry... suppose the NHS implodes between ops... I will end up very lopsided. One bionic knee, one bad knee, getting worse... what dreams will come tonight?!