Sue Knight's Blog

A winter sunrise and a summer poem

2012-02-12T00:16:00.000-08:00

Captain Camera has been out on the cold balcony taking photos of a lovely winter sunrise. The Channel has disappeared to its far horizons and the red sun is reflecting in all the seapools it has left. Don't worry seapools - your mum will soon be back.

A wonderful start to the day. My poor little car looks cold down there.

Jean and I were out on the field service yesterday - just for an hour as it was freezing. Its the meeting today and we are going to see Chris Packham tonight. Am still wrestling with the third difficult letter, but the other two, plus that last mysterious butterfly membership, went in the post yesterday.

When my sisters were here Col was looking through all his boxes and boxes of slides, so we saw the young us over and over at various stages. How young we all were once...

And we were surprised how many butterfly photos he has taken over the years. I was reminded of a poem I wrote years and years ago about our holiday in the Italian Tyrol - which is one of those places where it is easy to see the Paradise the earth was always meant to be and will become. Thank you Philip and Seppi for suggesting we took ourselves down there. We were there in June and spent days in mountain meadows full of wildflowers.

THE TINY DETAILS OF THE TYROL

by me

Through Colin’s camera we saw

The tiny details of the Tyrol

Little flat mushrooms

Stained glass inside flowers

And on moths’ wings

One foot of Tyrolean meadow

Could occupy us all day.

Questions people ask

2012-02-10T02:07:00.000-08:00

Is retirement boring? What do you find to do? How do you fill up your days?

Well, when I can find time, I will answer them. Yesterday, it was off to the group, then on to our Bible student, then a dash to the shops to post butterfly memberships and to buy something for lunch and cook it in time for Captain Eyetest's return from his expedition to Specsavers; afternoon, write talk to give to my householder at the Hall tonight - we are on the big stage in a weeks time - couldn't leave it any longer - make supper (aka "open a tin of soup") and drive to meeting. Drove back through heavy snow, though it didn't last and hasn't stayed. Today I have 3 urgent letters to do - letters, not emails - one in answer to an anguished postcard that arrived a week ago - study, make chicken casserole for weekend, and get ready for field service tomorrow. Although, bearing in mind that I am retired and tired (arthritis) my days are punctuated by plenty of couch potatoing in front of my daytime favourites and regular intervals lying on the bed (aching back, arthritis again).

But there is no reason to be bored in retirement. And in any case, you don't retire from the Christian preaching work. And there is no more satisfying and important - and urgent! - work. Which is not the same as saying that its easy.

Captain B who still has immense reserves of energy has left for Wisley. He will meet Mark there and they will photograph butterflies to their hearts content.

Sweet Lovers Love the Spring

2012-02-07T09:15:00.000-08:00

"Don't come cooing on my drainpipe!" roared Captain Butterfly as he strode forcefully towards the balcony, and a pair of courting doves sped wisely off.

Spring must be on the way. A pair of them tried to nest in our downpipe last year.

Pen left for London this morning and I was out on the door to door preaching work with Audrey - cold but sunny - croci everywhere - very little interest - a bit cold to keep people at their doors talking anyway. Still at least I am back to work.

Col was off at Wisley, drinking in the butterflies. There will be some wonderful photos on his blog soon. He bought me back a present from the bookshop there. An anthology by Owen Sheers called "A Poet's Guide to Britain".

I have already found an old favourite from my Uni days - Wulf and Eadwacer. We don't know who wrote it. It is a voice of longing from the past - maybe from a spring many many hundreds of years ago.

It begins:

"The men of my tribe would treat him as game:
if he comes to the camp they will kill him outright...

Wulf is on one island, I on another.
Mine is a fastness: the fens girdle it
and it is defended by the fiercest men.
If he comes to the camp they will kill him for sure...

Two Sisters

2012-02-06T09:03:00.000-08:00

No.1 sister left today and should be approaching our Northern hometown as I write. We - Col, Penny and I - went to Arundel this afternoon - bought some books and disappeared under a sea of hungry seagulls and such. I had brought the left over rice from last night and some seeds - and wish I had taken more food with me. The sisters treated us to a Thai takeaway last night - Jacks joined us. Col produced champagne and Baileys - and we ended up with a selection of chocolates - from Carol O'the North and Jean O' the Hall. Over in East Sussex - where there bee dragonnes - the snow apparently lies deep and thick and even. Here is it grey and mild and wet. And the Channel is calm.

No Snow Sunday

2012-02-05T03:20:00.000-08:00

Apparently its snowing everywhere else, but here it is mildish (for Winter) and very wet, though not actually raining at the moment. The Channel was a bit stormy, but even that is calming. Though it is the sort of sea surface that speaks clearly of its latent power.

Our writers weekend proceeds - with a mini-detox - one that allows cups of tea and coffee and a glass of wine in the evening.

Jackie is coming over tonight for a Thai takeaway. And us three sisters went to the Kingdom Hall for the public talk this morning.

February begins...

2012-02-02T13:43:00.000-08:00

... and its cold. Snow this weekend apparently. A whole 3 inches has been forecast. Snowmaggedon!

Back to the field this morning - Steve swung by and took me to the Bible student and we studied for an hour. Our student was saying that he had read Isaiah many times, but never understood it till now. And, touchingly, he said he had never had anyone to talk to about the Bible before.

It reminds me of when I began my study with the two Jehovah's Witnesses who called - all those years ago. Some very happy and amazing memories of that time. But there will be difficulties and obstacles too, and I must keep asking Jehovah that he will help our student over every one of them.

Captain Butterfly is staving off butterfly starvation in the bleak no-butterfly months by visiting Wisley regularly and bringing back some wonderful photos of the tropical butterflies. See the Captain's Log.

Made soup and baked apple and custard for his hungry Lordship's return, and went to the Hall for the meeting - really really cold but no frost or snow, yet. Sat with Audrey and gave her a lift back.

More family funerals

2012-01-31T08:36:00.000-08:00

To end the month on a sad, but hopeful note, I was at a family funeral today. It was a simple memorial service at the Kingdom Hall. One of my sisters, Win, had died. She was not young, in her nineties and had been in a home for nearly two years.

Given that I wasn't able to get up North to say goodbye to my last two aunts, or to Helen's funeral (another sister) even though it was only local, I am so glad I was well enough to get to this one.

Malcolm gave a perfect talk - as near as anything can be perfect in this system of things. And I learnt a bit more the history of this little seaside town, as Win had lived here for nearly all her life.

I also learnt how much she loved the creation, and that she especially loved trees. So now I am thinking that maybe, when she next opens her eyes, it will be in a forest clearing, somewhere in the Paradise earth, perhaps in May when all the leaves are so new and so green.

She was also noted for being a doer - her motto being "I would rather do than not".

Which made me worry a bit about my Memorial service should I have one. I am hoping not to have to die at all. But given that my special skill is Couch Potato-ing... oh dear.

And that is all I have been doing so far this afternoon.

It was a reasonably busy morning in that I took Audrey to the bank and shopping, then we went out and finished my magazine route for January. Then I shopped myself, picked up meds from Pharmacy (that is an occupation that takes up a fair amount of retirement - no time as yet to experience this boredom that some people have warned about), went to the Kingdom Hall to say goodbye to Win - and cooked - well more heated up - a late lunch for Captain Hungry and me and that was it.

Very overcast day and as cold as it has been. The Channel is a calm grey blue almost disappearing into a same coloured sky.

My life as a Bond girl

2012-01-30T03:34:00.000-08:00

You will all remember that seminal moment (in "Dr.Oh No Whatever Happened to Ursula Andress!!") when I zimmered out of the sea in my curly plastic bathing hat with matching flowery bathing costume, and offered James Bond a nice hot cup of tea from my thermos flask. But the moment I am really thinking about is the Moonraker one. Its when James and whatever the current girl's name was (Largechestia?) were skimming along the top of the earth's atmosphere, occasionally touching it and sort of sizzling the edges of their plane.

I identify with that quite a lot as I skim along the surface of Aspergers... and every time I touch it one of the connections in my head that makes sense of things flickers and uncouples.

It makes me realise how amazing the human brain is and what it does for us all the time. And, if it doesn't work, then how helpless we are.

My last big hit on the Asperger's atmosphere was when we were out with a friend from Expatworld who visits us most years. And we have known her for getting on for thirty years now. We had driven to the Arun river walk, and she and I had got out of the car. Then i was standing outside the car with Col getting his walking shoes out of the boot and there was a strange woman standing in front of me.

It wasn't till she spoke that I realised it was Julia, who had just got out of the car with me. I had no sense of missing her, no sense of having been with Julia, no recognition at all until she spoke and the thing clicked back - and James Bond drove the plane above the atmosphere again.

The brain is truly amazing. I believe that Darwin was honest about the problem it posed for the theory of Evolution. And of course we know even more about its complexity and capacity now, so I think if he was still with us he would have gone back to the drawing board a long time ago.

And its when it doesn't do what it should that you begin to get a glimpse of just how much it does do.

It is also a sad insight into the frozen world of deep autism, where nothing connects and nothing makes sense.

We are just talking to Bea on Skype - and I am hoping for a quiet day and a quiet week, to recharge my batteries for the weekend when we have visitors.

Saturday night with Tom and Jill - and the selfishness of Vikings

2012-01-29T05:57:00.000-08:00

Captain Butterfly took me on a forced march to Pagham Harbour yesterday afternoon. It was overcast and coldish with about 10 minutes of beautiful light as the sun came briefly through the clouds. I hope Col caught it - if so, there will be a photo on his blog at some stage. Later on we went to Tom and Jill's rambling country cottage for dinner, picking up Jacks en route. Home made fish and chips - and home made orange ice-cream, plus champagne. Brilliant. And a lovely evening with lots of laughs, which I needed as being ill for a month has left me feeling a bit sad.

Then being back with my brothers and sisters in the congregation, being taught, and cared for this morning built me up too. Audrey and I hope to be back into our Tuesday morning routine this week.

Col is off Metal Detecting. I suggested it might be helpful in these credit crunch days if he would find and bring back a Viking Horde, but he pointed out, with weary patience, that the Vikings didn't make it this far south.

How thoughtless of them. Did they give no consideration to our retirement income?

Butterflies and Bankers

2012-01-27T00:01:00.000-08:00

There should be a lovely butterfly blog on The Captains Log today, as he spent yesterday at Wisley - a reward for a day spent doing tax returns. It is Tropical Butterfly time of year there - all those glamorous flying flowers gliding gracefully about. I have had a small preview - and can only say, don't miss it.

How could something so exquisitely engineered and painted just happen? They speak so clearly of their Grand Creator and Designer.

In contrast, I note that the earthly powers are rubbing my nose in it today - the day after I paid my tax bill. It seems some Banker has just been given another massive bonus, and I am apparently to be impressed and grateful because it isn't as massive as it could have been.

I am trying to be grateful, but am feeling an unChristian desire to impress someone somewhere with something a bit painful. However... back to my studies... quickly.

And, importantly, I got back to the meetings last night - lovely to see everybody. I have never been away so long in all my years as as JW. The Christian congregation really cares for all of us, and is a powerhouse of purpose and energy - directed towards getting the preaching work done. I hope to be back out in the field Tuesday at the latest - well, in a sense, today, hopefully, if Captain Helpful feels able to take me on my magazine route. I only have a few days left to deliver January's magazines. There is a great one coming in February - all about Armageddon - specifically what the Bible says about it, which is the important thing.

Some people see it as WW3, a nuclear war - whereas the Bible says it is the war of God the Almighty. And it is a war that saves the earth from ruin, not one that brings it to ruin.

Sometimes too the Day of Judgement which follows it - the thousand years, the Millennial Reign - is presented as something dreadful - something to be feared. Yet its something to be longed for. All who come into the judgement will be given a completely fresh start, and the opportunity to learn about their Creator in the Paradise earth and be restored to the perfection our first parents had before they chose to cut themselves off from Jehovah, their Source of life.

Its a thought to hang on to when going through all these medical trials and tribulations.

And for all of us who need encouragement, I want to end with this lovely promise from the Hebrew prophet Isaiah, showing that the Day of Judgement is something to be longed for:

"Yes, for the path of your judgments, O Jehovah, we have hoped in you. For your name and for your memorial the desire of the soul has been. With my soul I have desired you in the night; yes, with my spirit within me I keep looking for you; because, when there are judgments from you for the earth, righteousness is what the inhabitants of the productive land will certainly learn." - Isaiah 26:8,9

A Day of Visitors

2012-01-25T12:25:00.000-08:00

We - well mostly Col, as he drove the Computer - did our tax returns today. Aaargh. But now they are done - and paid. And strangely, it was a day of visitors too - and lots of phone calls. Frances and Ella came by just before lunch with flowers and the C.O. talk for us to listen to. And Mick and June came in the afternoon. They sat me down with the Bible and a brochure and we talked about the Paradise earth to come. He read the verse from Psalm 37 that I had just been using in doing a bit of internet witnessing - all about how, if we endure to the end, we will have our "exquisite delight in the abundance of peace".

They also had a chat with Col about his Metal Detector finds.

And of course I talked to Audrey and Maggie by phone.

June brought over some of that lovely homemade marmalade, so I must make his Lordship some marmalade cupcakes tomorrow.

The Christian congregation really is a warm and loving family. And I am so grateful for it, and hope to get back to the meetings tomorrow, and restart my door to door witnessing by Saturday. People need to hear the truth so much - Christianity being called "the way of the truth".

They need to know that this is the darkest hour - just before the dawn.

“‘I, Jesus, sent my angel to bear witness to you people of these things for the congregations. I am the root and the offspring of David, and the bright morning star.’ - Revelation 22:16

Nigel Kennedy

2012-01-24T00:22:00.000-08:00

Another great trek last night - to see Nigel Kennedy in Brighton - his home town. Col bought the tickets - very very expensive tickets - months ago. Would I be able to go? My afternoons and evenings are much easier now, plus we could park next to the venue and there were no steps. So we went - us and Jacks.

Nigel and his musicians played - and played with - the Four Seasons. And maybe it was something like hearing it for the very first time. A wonderful evening.

Half his musicians were beautiful young girls - and were from all over the world - from Oz, from Poland, from the UK - there was a beautiful Vietnamese-Irish singer. There was a Nigerian singer, who took over the stage at one point, and probably fills concert halls on his own.

Beautiful young girls... as I am going to become 65 this year, I must remember to savour the last months of being a lovely young thing of 64.

Ten years lasts no time. Its an immensity of time when we are young. The years from 1 to 10, the years from 10 to 20, even the 20 to 30 years seem to take a little while to go by. But after that!

It was as I was approaching 40 that i began to truly realise just how short our lives are now.

We have seven decades - hopefully - and a bit - to be with the people we love and be in this lovely lovely world. It was feeling the wrongness of it, and feeling more and more conscious every day of the beauty of the world, that made me begin to look for the Creator of it, the meaning of it.

Was there any meaning to it all?

And then I found out the truth of Jesus words - that if you keep on seeking, you will find. But keep on - don't give up.

And I must now get back to the meetings and the door to door preaching work, as I so much want others to know that we are being offered life, to time indefinite, in the restored earthly Paradise.

I don't think Nigel Kennedy and his musicians would ever get tired of music. Or us of hearing them.

The Trek

2012-01-22T00:10:00.000-08:00

Captain Wonderful got me to the hospital on the Friday - a masterly feat of organisation. We called in on Audrey on the way and picked up the magazines she has kindly saved for me. It was a long long wait for the Top Guy, but we did get to see him. I carried a pile of cushions around to make the chairs high enough for me.

My blood tests show that I now need a whole new - and (here is the rub) expensive - level of medication. And the thorough examination of my joints proved the same. It went something like this :

TG: "Does that hurt?"
Me: "Yes"
TG: "Does that hurt?"
Me: "YES"
TG "Does that hurt? Just scrape the patient off the ceiling will you nurse."

He is very competent, with a very kind nurse, so I feel that I can trust the diagnosis.

Kindness is so important when you are in pain, so thank you to all at Worthing Rheumatology.

However, while the government can afford billions to Shock and Awe, destroy and rebuild, various countries that have never done any harm to us that I know of, they can't afford this medicine for me unless I come back in a month's time, redo the tests, and get the same results.

Anyway, I am on steroids for the moment to try to make my life a bit easier.

They worked wonderfully well yesterday afternoon, but I have regressed overnight. Just taken my second dose and am hoping for another comparatively pain free afternoon. And I go back in a month, hoping to pass the medication test.

Some people worry about what they will do with themselves in retirement. To which, at the moment, I can say, don't worry as medical matters will take up most of your time and energy. But its frustrating when you have lots of things you want to do.

However, I mustn't whinge too much as I can still type - so I can witness - and write - and do my studying.

And above all Jehovah sent his witnesses to my door to teach me the truth - Christianity being called "the way of the truth" - and I can hope for perfect health in the restored earthly Paradise.

An Outing

2012-01-19T02:53:00.000-08:00

I think its time I posted another poem, or verse... I can't do much else. The effort of getting out of bed/chair and walking about the flat is exhausting me. Through some wonderful engineering, Captain Butterfly managed to get me to the doctors for my blood test yesterday. He piled up the car seat with cushions and pillows, packed me in and strapped me in and managed to extract me at the other end without the help of a Giant Tin Opener driven by the SAS.

Because I wasn't able to straighten my arms, getting the blood was a bit difficult and I now have two bandaged arms.

It was a cold wet misty day, with the occasional flake of snow. But it was lovely to be outside again.

Its grey today with a wavy Channel, but not cold considering its mid Winter.

I got some lovely emails yesterday. One from my sister in law in Bavaria, and one from Aunt Bea. And lots of phone calls from my siblings in the congregation. And we heard some good news about Janet's brother!

Anyway, to the poem. It's very short so no need to panic. It was written many years ago, on a very different sort of Winter's day, when we were staying with friends in Thailand.

FRANGIPANI BLOSSOM

by me

Frangipani blossom in a plastic cup

And the sprinklers singing

In the cool morning air

As the sun revs up.

Sherlock - spoiler if you haven't seen it.

2012-01-16T12:38:00.000-08:00

Watched the last of the current Sherlock episodes. Did any one else? Wasn't going to, as the first ten minutes of the first one annoyed me so much that, disappointed, I stopped watching. But I am very glad I saw last night's episode. Wow! Great! Hope there will be another series. John Watson's military heel click as he turned away from Sherlock's grave in that wonderful churchyard still gets me all teary eyed.

And Sherlock standing right on that edge. With Jim Moriarty right behind him. Although of course I should have known Jim was too posh to push.

Still frozen up, but get slightly better towards the evening - better every day - but so far a night of pain always follows with me barely able to walk by the morning. Its one tottery step forward to several steps back. Audrey, Maggie and Frances rang me. And Danny. And poor Captain Headcold was at home all day looking after me.

Started on the figures for the tax returns - and also am progressing the Poetry Book. Ken sent an amazing poem about a hospital experience, and Dan and I decided we would put his Granddad's poem if everyone else OKs it.

Butterfly matters

2012-01-12T11:59:00.000-08:00

At least I can do something. A whole flight of butterfly memberships arrived on our doorstep yesterday and I am working away at them. The computer stuff is done - and I now have to make up and address all the membership packages. Poor old Captain B will have to take them to the Post Office though as I doubt I will be able to go out tomorrow. I have had to cancel my blood test as I simply could not get there this morning, I could neither have walked nor got myself into the car. Let alone out of it again. Bea skyped and Jackie and Audrey phoned, all doing wonders in the way of cheering me up.

Another bad night - and my Everest Climb

2012-01-09T01:18:00.000-08:00

Another bad night - disappointing as I thought i felt quite a bit better yesterday. Poor Captain Sleepless. Every other minute it seems I was moaning and groaning as my knees locked or my shoulder locked or my hands locked. And I had to get up twice - a business akin to climbing Everest at the moment.

A bulletin re my proposed Everest Climb: I am planning to be the first to reach the top by stairlift, as soon as one is installed. You can sit in comfort, have lots of flasks of hot tea, and read a good book during the boring bits. The subsequent best seller will be called "Into Thin Stair".

Its a good thing we have such a wonderful view from our flat, or I might be going stir crazy by now. In fact, that is a retirement tip I am now qualified to pass on. Retire to a place with interesting windows. Because you never know.

Also, a very strange thought. IF the Specialist can't get this under control at my imminent new medication appointment, maybe I have made my last trip North?

That is something I can't get my head round.

I am watching a calm, but rather ominous, dark grey Channel at the moment, with lots of cloud above with the risen sun coming through in patches. And the valiant dog walkers are out on the Green. And when the sea is stormy I can watch the waves crashing and crashing on the beach.

Obviously I am asking Jehovah for help and keeping up with my studying and even managing some witnessing, as I have been talking to people via email. Bob L from the USA had sent me an interesting site just before we went oop North, and I have had an interesting challenge in talking to him about that from the Biblical point of view.

And help came the other day in a wonderful way. I rang up Steve to ask how our Bible student was doing - and got an update. He has been taking a different brother and sister every week, so Mr.Student has been getting to know the congregation. Plus he has been being taught by much better teachers than me. And now he is talking of coming to the meetings.

It reminds me of me in my early days as I began to understand.

So it gave me such a feeling of joy, which is exactly what i needed. Jehovah is called "the God of all comfort". I was talking to Audrey on the phone and saying that all our calls on Mr.Student over the last couple of years are starting to bear some wonderful fruit.

Thanks to Jehovah and to his spirit, which He is obviously giving to this Bible student, as you can't understand the Bible without it.

An example. For many years I thought that the Bible said the aim for Christians was to get to heaven. Even when I stopped believing, I still thought the Bible said that. Yet, all the time, the Bible records that Jesus said the meek would inherit "the earth". The earth, not heaven.

It wasn't till I began my study, nearly 25 years ago now, that I began to understand. I so much hope that the student will continue, and will start to come to meetings, and will seek the true Refuge from the horrors of this present system of things.

A silver Sixpence

2012-01-06T00:58:00.000-08:00

Thinking about the sixpence that Captain Detector found on the beach yesterday. What would it have bought way back then?

24 aniseed balls from the sweet shop if my memory serves me correctly, and 6 of those pallid pastel lollies that i liked. And perhaps 3 sherbert dabs. I think they were tuppence.

I am frozen with my arthritis - just getting out of a chair is so exhausting and painful. I won't be going up to London next week. And, if they can't get this sorted out, well, I don't like to think about it.

My travelling days will be over for sure.

Scrambled Eggs

2012-01-04T01:50:00.000-08:00

We are back home, on the South Coast. A sunny South Coast after the storms of yesterday. I can still hardly move, and will not be able to shop, though I hope to totter about doing some ironing, and catch up on my studies. But Captain Fitness has roared off to look for (and count) the eggs of the rare Brown Hairstreak Butterfly with a fellow enthusiast.

"Eggs, brilliant" I said "That could solve the supper problem for tonight."

He paled, and at that moment a missive came flying through the letterbox questioning my position as a butterfly bureaucrat.

What did I do?!

What did I say?!

2012

2012-01-02T04:39:00.000-08:00

This Millennium is fairly racing along. And we are now into our New Year. Bea O'The Other Side of the Snake Pass gave us lunch yesterday - lamb pie and mash. Lovely to see her again. She is already turning the new garden into a work of art. We also had a day out at Lilac Tree Farm - yet another lovely meal - and, oh dear, another lovely pie and mash at Jim and Claire's. I won't fit in the car by the time we leave and Captain B will have to roll me all the way home. Its supposed to be very stormy tomorrow, so won't be much fun to drive in.

Scooter - The Return!!!

2011-12-29T01:01:00.000-08:00

I had better quickly write up a diary for the last week - before I forget. We set off for the bungalow a day late, on Saturday. There were 14 of us (counting the new baby) for the turkey dinner on the 25th. My sister did her usual masterful job of feeding us all, and Col and I helped with preparing the vegetables and clearing up. A days rest (for arthritis reasons, mine), and we did a lunch here for Jo, Jen and Kathryn. We all caught up with things. No walking sticks this year. Then another days rest and off to York yesterday, for a curry lunch with Keith, Janet, children and friends, followed by a mulled wine evening. To Jim's tonight (Col's old boss), and then to Lilac Tree Farm for family reunion No.2. Followed by Aunt Bea on Sunday. She is giving us lunch.

Overall... the bungalow and the house at York have undergone many changes over the year - most impressive. There is a new set of steps and a gate in the garden here for one thing, which makes it even more interesting and mysterious. I hope its going to provide some wonderful memories for the new young Eleanor Margaret.

And Scooter seems to have got her Masters in CatFlappery. She manages to clatter the flap louder than ever, the moment we start to fall asleep. I was lying in bed - awake through arthritis pains, all over - and I suddenly found a new pain being added to my pantheon - severe pins and needles in the sole of my foot. Then I realised I was being Scootered. She can't resist attacking a foot in the middle of the night. I got myself safely under the duvet again, and started to drift away in a haze of painkillers, when, suddenly CLATTER, CRASH, EXIT CAT FLAP stage left.

It seems noticeable, on the few times that politics/the state of things are mentioned, that people are giving up any hope in politicians.

Will they seek for the Refuge?

Surely some of them will.

What the doctor said to me when I had my tubes tilted

2011-12-23T11:09:00.000-08:00

"Mrs Knight", he said, "I do think you ought to credit Victoria Wood with that line". So, thank you Victoria, I do. Anyway, as the doctor said to me when he pumped me full of stuff for my pain (arthritis pain) "I hope that helps."

It does. And thank you very much. I managed to get to the Kingdom Hall last night and got to hear the talk from the Circuit Overseer, which was wonderful, all about how to protect and strengthen our faith. That is so important. Things are going to get worse before they get better, on a darkest hour before the dawn basis.

There has been another Earthquake in Christchurch! That lovely city. We have emailed Dorothy, hoping she is alright. Valiant though she is, she and everyone there must still be in a state of shock from the last time.

The increasing of natural disasters worldwide is part of the sign Jesus told us to watch out for. The fruitage of the rebellion in Eden is showing itself now as never before. We have had two World wars within living memory. But it does mean that our deliverance from the horrors of this present system of things on the earth is close at hand.

This has been a quiet day. We shopped early before the rush and have been packing and sorting, slowly getting ourselves ready to head oop North. Weather forecast for tomorrow OK.

We are getting news in daily as various friends send their 2011 newsletters. Todays included a card with news from Elizabeth, who I have known since she was five, and one from Ian and Cheryl in Oz. We have some photos of the evening we spent on their lovely yacht in Chichester Harbour in The Captain's Log.

They sailed her safely to Oz!

The Day Before the Day After Yesterday, Tomorrow

2011-12-20T11:55:00.000-08:00

That film about Global Warming is on again. Christmas week I suppose. Wonderful special effects, but I can't take the tsunami of political correctness, so I thought I would do another blog about my arthritis. What could be more gripping?

Private Eye have an all purpose Christmas week film called "They Flew to Bruges". It might be a better option.

Groan, groan, moan, moan, in pain, haven't been anywhere or done anything, except failed my degree in Stoicism. However I do have an emergency appointment at the hospital on Thursday afternoon. And I hope so much to get to my study with Rick tomorrow. The brother who conducts it will pick me up and bring me back.

And I hope the injection on Thursday will work, otherwise i don't see how I am going to be able to travel.

One nice thing today - well two nice things - I got a letter from Gale, a friend from my Uni days - with some lovely pictures of her son's wedding. And Janie rang and we had a long long talk. We have known each other since were were eleven years old.

The return of the Arthritis

2011-12-17T23:43:00.000-08:00

Yes, my arthritis is fine thanks. Holding my body in its iron grip. The steroids gave me a temporary relief in which I have pranced around like a (rather elderly) spring lamb. But now its back with a vengeance.

Its a lovely dawn here over the English Channel, with a range of cloud mountain all along the horizon. And a flock of seagulls has just flown across, like notes in a symphony.

I am desperately hoping that I can have another steroid jab before we set off on our trek oop North, but I suspect it will be too soon. They may puff me up till I am in danger from every passing Japanese whaling ship, but its wonderful to be pretty much free of pain, to be able to do things, and to have a bit of energy.

I don't even know if I will be able to get myself into the shower and dressed in time to get to the meeting this morning!

Did get out on the work yesterday, but Jay is not young either, and we only managed to do 45 minutes, as we were working in a tall block of flats with lots of stairs. However, we did get to talk to some people and gave them a chance to hear the truth - Christianity being called "the way of the truth".

And the Captain and me enjoyed the Strictly Final yesterday. It had to be between Harry and Chelsee and we thought either would have been a worthy winner. It was funny at the end when Harry won and his McFly bandmates invaded the pitch and had to be shooed off by Sir Bruce.

The Return of the Car

2011-12-16T10:24:00.000-08:00

The car is back - and feeling a lot better. It drove me up to the meeting at the Kingdom Hall last night.

Col and I went on a short-eared owl walk in the late afternoon. And what a beautiful December afternoon it was. So lovely. Cold though.

What will owls do in the evening when Paradise is restored and they no longer need to hunt voles? I hope the Captain and me are there to find out.

Bea says there has been some snow oop North.

To Jacks for supper tonight.

My Bible student is getting on so well its making me anxious and I am wondering if we will be able to pop by and say hello tomorrow.

A stormy day

2011-12-13T08:15:00.000-08:00

Amazing weather. Blue skies one minute and dark rain clouds the next. We had a rainbow and the light on everything was so lovely. It was Paradisical.

The day didn't get off to the best of starts. Woke up very creaky and zimmery. But managed to get myself together for the field service and down to my car, which did not work. The steering wheel wouldn't unlock.

So Col took me and Audrey to the Hall and then a brother and sister took us out on the field service.

The car is in hospital and will be back in a few days, with rather a large bill attached.

Col and I walked on the beach across the river this afternoon, until the rain started. It was freezing, and the sea was wonderful.

Mr Jingle Rides Again

2011-12-11T10:37:00.000-08:00

Thursday, Friday, forget what did - arthritis surging back - not too well - Sunday morning - out with Maggie - doing route calls and return visits - this evening - Jacks for supper - hastily cooked chicken casserole - too hot! - wrong kind of chile - may have to go for fish and chips if she can't stand it - Strictly results tonight - assume that Holly and the One Show Presenter will go - but who knows - surely Harry and Chelsee for Final - must go and put rice etc on - Jacks here any minute - feels like going to be cold night - busy week coming up - second Bible study with the reclusive guy - out with Audrey Tuesday - and the pioneers on Thursday - hope arthritis holds off - plan to rest tomorrow.

A Landmark Day

2011-12-07T13:33:00.000-08:00

Today I began the first Bible study I have conducted in England. I have had a few Bible students in my Expat days, but sadly none of them progressed. And I can now see what an ineffective teacher I was. Although I must always remember that it is Jehovah's spirit that does all the hard work.

Anyway, we (a brother and me) spent an hour there this morning, and started a study. We are using the book "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" And I was touched and happy to notice that the householder, who I have been calling on for about a year and a half now, had got his well-worn Bible out and was already into the second chapter, checking against his Bible as he went!

I had left him the book about a week ago.

The other lovely thing is that I won't be conducting the study myself, as I am doing it with a brother, so my householder will get a much better teacher.

I also got a chance of a talk with a young lady I have been calling on for about 6 months. Not finding her at home, I had left a butterfly card, giving my contact details, in case she wanted to talk to me. And she did ring. Although it was because she couldn't think who it was who had left the card!

Anyway, we had a lovely talk and she seems very appreciative of the magazines I leave every month.

I then put my Butterfly Bureaucrat wings on and flew off and posted the membership packages, shopped, and winged my way back home. Captain Butterfly had a sandwich box lunch as he was off clearing woodlands for butterflies.

I actually went to bed this afternoon I was so tired. I hope its nothing new and sinister. Its probably just the usual arthritis tiredness, surging back as the steroids wear off.

Which reminds me, I am under strict instructions from Captain Sensible to write to the hospital and see if they will give me another injection before our trip up North. I doubt they will, but I can ask.

The Lobster Pot Poem

2011-12-05T11:05:00.000-08:00

A lonely lobster pot

A pot without a lobster

Sits lonely on the beach
I wonder where the lobster is
Oh surely out of reach.
Does it sit upon a dinner plate

Or in a stew somewhere?

I wonder where the lobster is
I hope it's out of reach ...
As the empty pot sits still
Upon the stony beach.

By Beanonymous

This brightened my morning - which included a visit to the Lung Lady. One test OK, one test not so good as last time. I only hope it might be down to tiredness as I have just had an exhausting weekend.

And, like the mysterious poet, I also hope the lobster got away.

Haysbridge

2011-12-05T01:02:00.000-08:00

We made it to Haysbridge by 8 o clock Saturday morning with Col as our gallant chauffeur and sadly minus Ken who is not at all well. And we (Col and me) later made it to the annual dinner of the Treasure Hunters, on Saturday night. The others went to bed early. And we were so exhausted we didn't make it back to Haysbridge till 8.30 Sunday - but we were still in plenty of time - got our seats and had a cup of tea before it started.
Bea has sent us a wonderful Betjemanesque poem about the lobster pot - and I think it will appear in The Captain's Log. His blog has a much higher readership than mine so we feel it should go there.
Bea is now our only aunt.
Every generation has gone through this - and found it just as startling and difficult to cope with. Which is because getting old and dying was not meant to happen to us. We were made to live forever.
Today is a hospital visit (moi - lung test), and then I have to tackle my first pile of paperwork from the Butterfliers. I am hoping that it will start to make sense as I begin to do it.
If not, will I be responsible for the sudden extinction of the Butterfly in Sussex!
aaarrgh.

Consolingly disasterous

2011-12-01T08:30:00.000-08:00

"...Still the sea,
Consolingly disastrous, will return
While the strange starfish, hugely magnified,
Waits in the jewelled basin of a pool."
(John Betjeman)

We have no rockpools. It isn't that sort of beach. But the consolingly disastrous (and very stormy) sea had swept the beach clean as it always does, and had washed up all sort of shells and seaweeds along with this lobster pot. The beach was pretty empty this morning with a bright blue sky overhead and rain in the distance.

Its raining now - and we were rained off the work after three quarters of an hour. I was out with a young pioneer sister. Audrey and I have had a phone chat and plan to work together Tuesday morning, as usual.

Beauty joined to energy

2011-11-29T13:11:00.000-08:00

Here is my review of the Degas Exhibition at the R.A. that Col, Jacks and me went to on Monday:

There were not enough seats, and those that were supplied were not comfortable. The Earl Grey tea was good and I loved the teapots - they looked nice and poured properly.

The paintings?

Here is a verse from a poem called "Museum Piece" by Richard Wilbur:

"See how she spins! The grace is there,
But strain as well is plain to see.
Degas loved the two together:
Beauty joined to energy."

Yes. Wonderful dancers. But he was interested in the body and the energy, the movement. He didn't seem to be interested in the faces at all. And I hadn't realised how fascinated he was by the new art of photography. Exciting times.

There was a few seconds of film showing an elderly Degas walking in a Paris (I suppose it was Paris?) street with a young girl. Sitting there watching it was like getting into the Tardis for a moment.

So its an exhibition well worth seeing.

Audrey and I were out on the work this morning. We both placed literature and will need to call back. Mick is going to help me with the possible Bible student, but not till next week. We are all so busy this week.

I had a bad night with an arthritis shoulder.

Col and I had a walk on the beach this afternoon. There was a strong wind, white water and foam flowers blowing everywhere. Standing on the pier watching the immense sea surge up the river was fantastic. Beauty joined to energy.

It was another lovely day in retirement. I am grateful for every one of them.

In which I become a Butterfly Bureaucrat

2011-11-26T07:57:00.000-08:00

Jean and I were out on the door to door preaching work this morning. We covered our territory, without any response, and then did a couple of return visits.

Yesterday we (me and the Captain) met Linda in Cowfold and she handed over all her paperwork to me. I am now a Butterfly Bureaucrat and must start to get to grips with all that the Membership Secretary has to do.

Its a bit of a puzzle at the moment.

Col has taken his wings off and put on his SUSSAR hat and left early, with an extra large packed lunch, for a Mountain Bike Training day.

No I don't understand it either. All I know is there were four of them, I was asked to provide cakes, and made a batch of marmalade muffins for them all.

When we were in Expatland, I used to make a big tray of carrot cake to take on the dive boat. I hardly bake these days.

Jackie gave us supper last night - an Italian dish, not lasagne, but the one without pasta whose name now escapes me - followed by hot mince pies. We see her again Monday.

Today is grey with a coldish wind, and the Channel is blue grey outside the window - with long white waves curling and uncurling.

How did Jehovah create water? It is so beautiful and powerful. And when the earth is finally restored to Paradise and there are new things again, what amazing things will we see?

The last of the Nabbs Family

2011-11-23T06:25:00.000-08:00

We got more sad news yesterday, as we heard that Aunt Deirdre has died. I think Mr.Skimpole would have called her The Beauty Aunt. All our aunts were and are beautiful by the way, but I think it is Deirdre that Mr.Skimpole would have given that particular designation to.

The photo is of the family at Nabbs, many years ago. We are on the bottom lawn - the steps to the top lawn can be seen behind us.

Aunt Deirdre was the last of the Nabbs "grown-ups".

The Bible's warning that, at the moment, "death reigns as king over us", sounds louder every year.

How young we all were then, including the timeless aunts and uncles. But how quickly the years have gone by.

Audrey and I were out on the work that morning, trying to tell people the good news of the incoming Kingdom of God, and to reassure them that the dead will wake up from the sleep of death when the time comes.

We worked in an area with a lot of shops and, where possible, i.e. when the shops were not busy, we left little leaflets with the staff.

Its was a grey November day, which was appropriate.

Butterfly Business

2011-11-20T23:34:00.000-08:00

Sonia Copeland Bloom

It was the Butterfly AGM yesterday - at the Cheltenham Racecourse. Which is a splendid building with fantastic views. It is not somewhere we would visit in the normal course of events as we do not involve ourselves with horse racing.

What can I say about it? Well worth the visit - what a professional organisation Butterfly Conservation is. The speaker from Marks and Sparks - Mike Barry, Head of Sustainable Business - was impressive, as you would expect. The Treasurer's Report was both interesting and understandable. (I am usually like Edwina in Ab Fab when it comes to discussing money matters, holding my head in my hands and sobbing "Just tell me how much money we've got!", as fiscal this&thats get discussed. I have even sobbed over the phone to a girl at the Tax Office about filling in my Tax Forms: "You know more about my money than I do. Can't YOU fill it in?!")

Sonia Copeland Bloom (Orlando Bloom's mum) gave us a short talk on the series of children's book she is writing about insects. She read an extract from her butterfly book: "Crystal, the Small Miracle". It was wonderfully anthropomorphic, which as someone who has been a moth-er of several moth babies, I appreciate. But she also researches so that the books are accurate and the children can learn happily from reading them. I am so glad she used the word "miracle", as egg to caterpillar to chrysalis to butterfly is exactly that. A miracle.

I joined the queue and got her to sign books for Eleanor Margaret and for Beth.

Neil joined us for lunch, which was baked potato with chile and salad. Altogether a nice day out.

Today Captain B was off early with his Treasure Hunter hat on, and I was off to the meeting - then a few return visits - and then home.

It was such a beautiful Autumn day I only wish I could find the words to describe it. As I was doing my return visits I was thinking that this is surely another glimpse of the Paradise the earth is going to be, and I was longing to tell people about it.

A misty November afternoon

2011-11-17T23:16:00.000-08:00

We spent Tuesday afternoon at Cissbury Ring. The sun was shining on the last of the Autumn colours, but it was also damp and chilly, and the horizons disappeared into soft mist. Mushrooms and toadstools had sprung up everywhere - each one a miracle. Wednesday was a housework day, with Col off on a butterfly work party. I made a fish pie for him to come home to. Thursday I was out with Louise, but we found hardly any of our return visits at home. I am hoping - hoping! - that we can start a doorstep Bible study with a very nice guy as we have had some interesting talks recently. We will be flying North with the annual migration of the butterfly herds, as it is the Butterfly Conservation AGM this weekend.

Another lovely Autumn day...

2011-11-15T05:45:00.000-08:00

... but with a hint of Winter, down here by the Channel. The sea is fairly calm, the sun is shining, but it is quite cold. Captain B is settling down again to real life after his dive holiday. I swooped and flew and hovered round his luggage as he unpacked it in the hall Saturday night, until with an interesting rustle, a parcel wrapped in Maldivian newpaper appeared. I carried it off to my lair on the kitchen table, and I now have a lovely clownfish coffee mug.
He is back at the helm of the coffee machine too.
Jacks came round on Sunday night to hear about his adventures and have supper (chicken and chick pea casserole and apple crumble).
Audrey and went out this morning - return visits and route calls. I was able to take the "Does God Really Care?" brochure to a lovely lady who had asked me the question as to why there is so much suffering if there is a God who is good and all-powerful.
Its a question I always used to ask, and I hope she will find the Biblical answer as wonderful as I did. And do.

A cycling fish

2011-11-12T09:49:00.000-08:00

Col just rang from Gatwick!

I don't know if anyone remembers that Womens Lib slogan: "A Woman Needs a Man Like a Fish Needs A Bicycle". Well, I think I must be a cycling fish, and will be very glad to have him safely back - and will spend the next 45 minutes trying not to worry about the drive back from the airport - in the dark.

Anyway, it was a busy day. Out with June in Arundel this morning, working in a lovely close, on a beautiful Autumn day. Just right for trying to tell people about the Creator of it all. And this afternoon I had a sudden surge of energy - perhaps my detox helped - and went out for nearly two hours, and found two people I have been trying to find at home for months.

And I have a curry simmering away, as Jackie is coming for supper tomorrow.

The House of One Milk

2011-11-11T12:35:00.000-08:00

Soon to become the house of two milks again - all being well - and Captain Butterfly arrives back safely from his Indian Ocean adventures. The "real" milk is thawing out even as I type. And I have made an apple crumble - his favourite pudding.

This morning I took Audrey to the shops and had a coffee with her afterwards. She has some lovely Autumn toadstools on her lawn, and that got us thinking about when the earth is Paradise again. Will all fungi be edible? Or will our brains be working so perfectly then that we will have no problem sorting the good mushrooms from the bad?

Either way, it would be wonderful to go mushrooming every Autumn.

Headlines today worrying about a "financial Armageddon". There are hard times ahead - but it is on a darkest hour before the dawn basis, as we are trying to tell people as we go door to door.

At your age

2011-11-08T10:44:00.000-08:00

Something I am hearing more and more frequently as I trek from doctors surgery to hospital outpatients is this:
"At your age, you have to expect (whatever)".

"What are you talking about -and to a sprightly young thing like me!" I mutter crossly to myself as I zimmer home.

Jehovah is called "the God of all comfort", and here was this wonderful thought from Him, via his congregation, in my "Examining the Scriptures Daily". Food at the right time.

This is our Thought for Tuesday, November 8th, 2011

"The women telling the good news are a large army." - Psalm 68:11

"By having a full share in the ministry and by willingly making sacrifices for that work, sister prove that they treasure their role in the congregation. In writing to Titus, Paul stated: "Let the aged women be reverent in behaviour... teachers of what is good that they may recall the young women to their senses to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sound in mind, chaste, workers at home. good, subjecting themselves to their own husbands, so that the word of God may not be spoken of abusively". (Titus 2:3-5) What a force for good the mature sisters in the congregation can be! By respecting the brothers who take the lead and by making wise decisions in such areas of life as dress and grooming and entertainment, they set a fine example for others, and show a high regard for their own place in the congregation."

I felt a lot better after reading that.

Audrey and I (mature sisters if there ever was one) did some magazine calls and return visits this morning - in the drizzle. And after I had taken her back home, I took myself straight off to the shops and got a load of stuff in, as I knew i would not want to go out again.

Captain B and I typed at each other under our blurry Skype pictures and waved a bit. And Bea and Audrey rang. My conversation with Bea - about "The Diary of a Nobody", reminded us of the Betjeman poem "Middlesex" which starts off so funny, but ends on an elegiac note about the death of rural Middlesex, and for Murray Posh and Lupin Pooter "long in Kensal Green and Highgate, silent under soot and stone".

The Diary of a Nobody...

2011-11-07T11:25:00.000-08:00

Its a bit hard to know what to put in my blog at the moment. Especially as the Captain's is so vivid. Some lovely colours today - saturated reds and blues. I spoke to him this afternoon - and Audrey has been on the phone a couple of times. Yesterday was the meeting at the Hall, and i did some magazine route calls on the way back.

If I were to write up today it would basically be: did nothing, saw no-one, as I have been cleaning the flat and slowly climbing paperwork mountain. It is more of a hill now, so something has been accomplished.

There is an interesting article in this month's Awake! which I hope will make all who read it think about the violent attempts that have been made by the powers-that-be to prevent people from finding out what the Bible actually says.

The article is "John Foxe" and his Turbulent Times."

In part it says: "A citizen of nearby Coventry, Agnes told Foxe about a widow named Smith (or Smythe) who had taught her children the Ten Commandments and Jesus' model prayer, often called the Lord's Prayer. Instead of teaching her children in Latin though, she taught them in English. For this "crime" she was burned at the stake, along with six men who were similarly charged. Because this gross injustice angered the people, the local Bishop spread the word that the victims were burned for the "greater crime" of eating meat on Fridays and other fast days."

Its hard to know where to start with that one. Though I will just point out that the Christian Greek Scriptures enjoin no fasts. You can eat meat, or not eat meat, as and when you want. All they do specify is that if you eat meat, it must be properly bled. You must not eat the blood.

Why was teaching children God's word in their native language so horribly punished?

An evening with Jackie

2011-11-05T15:50:00.000-07:00

Just back from Jackies. She made a lovely supper of soup, then salmon with asparagus, followed by chocolate pot. No blog from Captain Butterfly which is a bit worrying. Jean and I were out on the doors this morning. We decided to do route calls rather than go to Arundel. It seems to have been a good decision as we found quite a few people in. And I heard about her holiday in Cornwall - which is another place that holds some wonderful childhood memories for me, as my granny used to have a house down there, on the beach at Praa Sands. Its now a premier surfing beach, but then it was empty. There has been a dreadful crash on the M5, down in the West Country I believe - one of the worst motorway pile-ups ever. Very frightening, and such a tragic ending for many peoples journey.

A Migration

2011-11-04T03:31:00.000-07:00

There should be a cloud of 2012 butterfly calendars winging their way to their various overseas destinations - Germany, Oz, Nz, and Saudi - as I am just back from posting them.

Did I see David Attenborough and his camera team in hot pursuit?

No.

The Channel is much calmer today and there are a lot of clouds, but its oddly warm.

Walking on the Moon

2011-11-03T02:29:00.000-07:00

After an intensive training course from Captain B, I did manage to get the percolator to make me a cup of coffee, but not till after flying it to the moon and back a couple of times. Bea rang this morning and we had a long talk. Yesterday was a hectic packing day, and on Tuesday I went out on the door to door preaching work with Maggie. We had a very good morning - Maggie especially - lots of good talks - and people to call back on. Or, more grammatically, people on whom to call back. This morning ought to be a housework and paperwork morning - plus I need to turn yesterday's mushrooms into a curry, then I plan to go out on the doors with a young pioneer sister, and tonight its the meeting. As the Psalmist said: "I rejoiced when they were saying to me:
“To the house of Jehovah let us go.”"

It is a blue grey sort of day - it has been raining - may still be - hard to tell - and I am enjoying watching the waves on The Channel. The balcony geraniums are waving in the wind.

The feathers of the willow

2011-11-02T00:40:00.000-07:00

(This should have been posted yesterday. I had a careless moment and deleted a whole load of my blog posts. Captain Butterfly managed to reclaim some of them from the DeleteoSphere, but not all).

Suddenly its November. The "feathers of the willow" month (as in the Dobson poem). Maggie and I were in Angmering this morning, on the door to door preaching work. That meant an excursion onto the grown-up road with its big boy roundabouts. We found quite a lot of people in and will need to make some return visits.

My eye problem is down to getting old (sigh) and I will have to learn to live with it (according to the Specialist at the hospital yesterday). I had an ocean load of drops in my eyes and they were scanned to the max. "Aha", said the doctor, "I can see the little spider. It looks more like a tadpole though." Apparently its a shadow caused by the thing that has happened in my eye. I will be content if it gets no worse - and look forward hopefully to perfect eyesight in the restored earthly Paradise.

The Captain and I went to Cissbury Ring this afternoon for a two hour walk. And, wonderfully, we found Neil crouching over a Clouded Yellow he was photographing. So the Captain's day was made as near to perfection as is possible at the moment, and therefore so was mine.

We are looking forward to watching the final of "71 Degrees North" tonight.

It has been another beautiful Autumn day.

Bonfires

2011-11-01T13:24:00.001-07:00

Oct 30
Its 3 p.m. and the bonfire on the green is still burning merrily away! It was amazing last night - see the Captain's Log for photos. I don't think there is anything left for me to record really. It was a bit frantic trying to get the supper ready for everyone, but it got done and we all had a good time. And we can live on the left overs for the next week I should think.

The Butterfly AGM was fun. Excellent speakers, one of them being Michael Blencowe who gave his usual funny and informative summary of the Butterfly Year (with great photos). And the other speaker Torben Larsen was amazing - a Butterflier Supreme - see the Captain's log for more info.

David of the Clouded Yellows drove us there and back. And it was such a beautiful afternoon - the blue blue sky of October along with a whole tapestry of Autumn colours.

Blue Skies

2011-11-01T13:23:00.001-07:00

Oct 27

Can skies get bluer than this?

We went to Cissbury Ring yesterday afternoon, which is where the photo was taken. I had coffee with Audrey in the morning.

Maggie rang to ask for another butterfly calendar.

We saw our first picture of the new great niece today. She looks so lovely. And I am now thinking about how fresh and new the world is for her. And how much of the olden days we are.

A great aunt and uncle

2011-11-01T13:22:00.001-07:00

We became a great aunt and uncle again today, as Nadine and Alex have had a little girl. We look forward to meeting her in December.

I think back to my young childhood and my uncles and aunts. I can't even remember the "great" generation, except for my great aunt Hilda whose dressing table I still have.

As Ecclesiastes says: "A generation is coming and a generation is going."

Oct 25
It has been a lovely lovely Autumn day - amazing light - a great day to first open your eyes in.

Simon and Co dropped in for a cup of tea and a chat on their way back up North - which was a lovely surprise.

Captain Butterfly's Dream

2011-11-01T13:21:00.000-07:00

The Willow Pond

Oct 24

"Last night I dreamt that I disturbed a Clouded Yellow" said Captain B striding off hopefully into what was left of the summer meadow at Brandy Hole Copse.

Sadly the dream didn't come true. All we saw was a large bumble bee, a wasp, a green woodpecker (briefly), two dog walkers and a jogger. Lovely to be out there though, on a perfect Autumn Monday morning, when we have spent so many of our Monday mornings cooped up in offices. The wind is strong, the Channel is roaring, and now the sky is clouding over. There is supposed to be torrential rain down in the West country.

We had a sandwich lunch on the bench by the pool.

Yesterday was a quiet day - just the meeting in the morning. Audrey and i are off on the field service tomorrow morning.

A beautiful Autumn and a beautiful girl

2011-11-01T13:20:00.001-07:00

How wonderfully Jehovah made Autumn.

2011-11-01T13:19:00.002-07:00

June and I were working on the doors near the station this morning, and when we finished our territory we walked on round the corner to see if I could find a young girl that I met about 18 months ago. She was a Filippina, and one of the most beautiful girls i have ever seen. We had a long chat and she took a "What Does the Bible Really Teach?" book. I have called back many times and never found anybody at home. However today the door was answered and I was able to find out that she now lives in another town, but keeps in touch. I sent her my love and hope that her new congregation will be able to contact her.

June gave me a jar of home made ginger marmalade and a jar of home pickled onions.

Yesterday I took Maggie on her magazine route. And it was a cooking afternoon - mushroom soup and apple crumble for His Lordship's tea. Looks like another cooking afternoon tomorrow - ginger marmalade muffins.

A young lad called by unexpectedly to look at, and quote for, the problem windows in the block. We had quite a long chat, and he took a "Who Really Rules the World?" brochure with him.

Jackie is back - hurray - and we are invited to supper there tonight.

It is another lovely Autumn day - cold but sunny - Autumn leaves everywhere, and the balcony geraniums flourishing.

The London Aunt

2011-11-01T13:19:00.000-07:00

We had lunch with Aunt Jo yesterday - in London. It was a beautiful day - dazzling blue sky, the odd white fluffy cloud - coldish - London very green with the Autumn colours everywhere. Lovely rowan tree from Jo's window with the Autumn sun making the red berries shine.

We gave her a copy of the 2012 Butterfly Calendar, which has come out very well.

She gave us a quiche with salad, followed by creme caramel, with a very good red wine. And coffee. We talked about new things, and old things.

Every generation goes through this process - the layers and layers of memory accumulated. Uncle Paul's funeral is now receding into the past. And we were remembering our time in the Lake District with them when we were all young. And the lovely curries Paul used to cook for us. And how, before I was married, Uncle Paul used to walk me home to my bedsit in Baron's Court.

The bus ride to and from Aunt Jo's was also a trip into the recent past - our expat past - as it is very Islamic now, with Arabic writing on nearly all the shops, lots of ladies in abayas, Lebanese restaurants, a prayer call going on somewhere, and verses from the Koran at the bus station. I was hurtled past them by Captain Speedy before I could take in more than the first one - which is basically that there is only one God.

Is-landing

2011-11-01T13:18:00.000-07:00

Oct 18

I have been re-reading Janet Frame's three- part autobiography: "To the Is-land", "An Angel at my Table" and "The Envoy from Mirror City" - and I want to quote and quote from it.

Here she is speaking of her earliest memories, including one that is "something that could not have happened". She captures the strangeness of those first few remembered things - seen and felt so vividly, but not understood. There is no context to put them in.

Then she writes of her most vivid memory of that time: "I remember a grey day when I stood by the gate and listened to the wind. I had my first conscious feeling of an outside sadness, or it seemed to come from outside, from the sound of the wind moaning in the wires. I looked up and down the white dusty road and saw no-one. The wind was blowing from place to place past us, and I was there, in between, listening. I felt a burden of sadness and loneliness as if something had happened or begun and I knew about it. I don't think I had yet thought of myself as a person looking out at the world; until then, I felt I was the world. In listening to the wind and its sad song, I knew I was listening to a sadness that no relation to me, which belonged to the world."

The sadness that belonged to the world. I used to feel that walking through the beautiful Derbyshire Dales of my childhood. Why was there a sadness about everything? What had happened?

Audrey and I were out on the preaching work this morning, trying to get people to see what the Inspired Scriptures tell us about this sadness and what Jehovah, the Creator, is doing to restore the Paradise we lost. We did magazine route calls and return visits as the map today had too much walking for Audrey. And I took her to the bank.

I re-met a lovely Asian lady - I think perhaps Filippino - haven't been able to ask, as on both occasions I seem to have got her out of the shower. But she took last months magazines - which had an article about what the Bible has to say about who really rules the world - she has taken this months - and would like me to drop by with November's.

My Talk and a Monsoon Sky

2011-11-01T13:15:00.001-07:00

Oct 16
This after-the-monsoon sky was taken by Captain B the Great yesterday afternoon. It was an afternoon of lovely light and violent showers of rain, plus a rainbow which I didn't see. I was out with a young pioneer sister in the afternoon - we did some return visits, until we were rained back to our car. And then it was my talk at the Hall last night. I was very very nervous and did not deliver it well, but at least it got done. Anyway, here it is below.

The setting was: Encouraging a Bible student to attend meetings

And the brief was: How are we assured of God’s love for us at Romans 8:26,27?

I was to work on Gestures - and I did remember to add a few wooden herky-jerky gestures as I went through it.

THE TALK

Sue. Its been lovely to conduct the study with you L. as always. Is the same time next week fine?

L. Yes. I’ll look forward to it. What an amazing book the Bible is. I just hope I didn’t ask you too many questions!

Sue. Not at all. Its encouraging to see you are thinking about it. Jehovah asks us to love him with all our mind, as well as with all our heart, so you need to make sure of everything. But I do want to mention our meetings again. If you would come to the Kingdom Hall - maybe just come to the public talk this Sunday for example - you would get so many of your questions answered. All our meetings are teaching meetings – there is no ritual involved.

L. I don’t think I’m ready for that. I’ve got real problems with the idea of ever joining an organised religious group again. I don’t mind studying the Bible with you – in fact I love doing it - but that’s as far as I want to go.

Sue. Were you bought up in a religion?

L. Yes, but its not something I want to talk about.

Sue. Fair enough, if you don’t want to talk about, I respect that. But I can’t help wondering if you have thought to talk to Jehovah about it? You do know how to pray to him now.

L. No, I wouldn’t do that. I don’t know if I can even explain it to myself, let alone to God.

Sue. Then before I go, may I ask you read these verses – Romans 8:26,27?

L. (Reads Romans 8:26,27) "In like manner the spirit also joins in with help for our weakness; for the [problem of] what we should pray for as we need to we do not know, but the spirit itself pleads for us with groanings unuttered. Yet he who searches the hearts knows what the meaning of the spirit is, because it is pleading in accord with God for holy ones."

Sue. Do you see that God’s spirit will plead for us with groanings unuttered – things that we perhaps don’t know how to say, or don’t even know we need to say. Jehovah loves us and wants to help us.

L. But how can I be sure of it?

Sue. Think of the Bible itself as a perfect example of the power of Jehovah’s spirit to help us. Lets look again at the claim it makes. (Reads 2 Timothy 3:16,17) "All Scripture is inspired of God and beneficial for teaching, for reproving, for setting things straight, for disciplining in righteousness, that the man of God may be fully competent, completely equipped for every good work." So this book that can make us fully competent and completely equipped for every good work has been inspired by God’s spirit and protected and preserved by that spirit down to this day. Now why would Jehovah have done that?

L. Because he wants us to know Him?

Sue. Yes, exactly. And because Jehovah wants to get us safely back to him. He doesn’t want anyone to be lost. He will guide and help us every step of the way, if we let him. As he said to the Israelites centuries ago at Isaiah 48:17,18 – please just read these words Louise. They are as true now as they were then.

L. (Reads Isaiah 48:17,18) " This is what Jehovah has said, your Repurchaser, the Holy One of Israel: “I, Jehovah, am your God, the One teaching you to benefit [yourself], the One causing you to tread in the way in which you should walk. O if only you would actually pay attention to my commandments! Then your peace would become just like a river, and your righteousness like the waves of the sea."

Sue. Jehovah is the one teaching us to benefit ourselves. He wants us to listen to him, so he can get us safely back to him. And he will help us. So pour your heart out to him as best you can – ask for his help with the difficulties that you have. And next week I’ll bring you details of the next public talks, just in case you feel able to come along to one.

At which point I tottered gratefully off the stage and was able to enjoy the rest of the meeting, and the Elder taking the Ministry School was (of course) very kind about my efforts.

Went to doctors for blood pressure things this morning and then on to Audrey's for a cup of tea.

On the menu?

2011-11-01T13:13:00.000-07:00

Oct 15
One of the travel stalls at the Alexandra Palace Wildlife Expo - responsible, low carbon footprint etc etc - offered this: A Self-Drive Safari. I thought about us, Captain Butterfly and his Mrs, driving ourselves off into the backwoods of the Masai Mara, and then thought about the local lion prides musing over the Meals on Wheels menu.

If anything is worth self-driving through London for, the Wildlife Expo is. IF. And the view from the Palace is quite something. I think the Captain's Log will have more detail, including an interesting butterfly name. We had a fascinating talk on the ecology behind London place names - and a talk from a Canadian lady who helps run an amazing brown bear reserve in Alaska, and two other wonderful talks/video/slideshows, but i can't remember the names of the Speakers, and Captain B has the programme.

Horse drawn kettles, and eating barbed wire

2011-11-01T13:08:00.000-07:00

Oct 5
Its back to student days today. The kettle has packed up and until tomorrow when we can make an emergency dash to the shops, I am making tea the old fashioned way: drawing the water laboriously from the well, filtering out the tadpoles, hitching the horses to the kettle. Or, to put it another way, its back to the student method of heating up water in a saucepan.

I think the last time I had to do this was in our early years in Expatland, when the Sheik, Chuck and Mary, and all the divers went to the Maldives, and I stayed behind house and kitten sitting for Chuck and Mary. They had three very tiny and valuable Persian kittens (plus mum and aunt) to be sat on.

My first morning there it dawned on me that Americans don't have kettles as they don't drink tea. There was a coffee making machine that could have flown me to the moon - and would certainly have made me a cup of coffee had I wanted one. But I didn't. So I was reduced to saucepan tea.

In the early hours of the following morning I had a strange dream of being at a big Buckingham Palace style banquet and lifting the food to my mouth, only to have it turn painfully into barbed wire as I tried to eat it. I woke up to find that two tiny Persian kittens were fighting on my head.

Audrey and I were out on the doors this morning. We finished our territory and then I took Audrey to her Russian lady. A quiet night in lies ahead for me and Captain B, I hope. I am anxiously practising my talk for Thursday.

Autumn Sunrise

2011-11-01T13:06:00.001-07:00

Oct 3
Col has been photographing the wonderful sunrises. We are having strange weather - an Indian summer, very hot but with a haze of Autumn all round. The green and the beach were packed yesterday. A quiet weekend. I took Saturday off and spent it with Col. We watched the rugby - not that I can tell one end of a rugby bat from the other - and did a big shop at Tesco's. And on Sunday I turned some of what we lugged home into a roast lamb dinner and a nectarine and plum crumble.

The talk at the Hall on Sunday morning was all about Christian hospitality. A worrier for me as I am the exact opposite of a people-person...

Maggie and I are adjusting happily to our new seats in the back row. We will have some decisions to make when we have our new Kingdom Hall next year. Our old one is not only old, but is bursting at the seams.

Bob of the North Americas is sending me his travel blog. He has recently pitched his tent by the wide Missouri. How evocative all those names are. And what a golden country America seemed when I was a Convent schoolgirl in the Fifties. It reminds me of a line by an Oz poet, something about listening to an American radio station "singing a song of sidewalks".

An Autumn Day in Retirement

2011-11-01T13:03:00.001-07:00

Sep 25
Here is a toadstool/mushroom to celebrate the season. It could be an inkcap, but it is in fact a parasol mushroom (Captain Butterfly has just looked it up for me).

It has been a lovely Autumn day here - Captain B roving the woods - and me at the Kingdom Hall. After I had given Audrey a lift back, I drove back along the seafront, The Channel was a pale clear turquoise, the tide was high, and there were little yachts regattaing about.

Our brother from Bethel HQ gave the public talk today - all about our Christian identity. It was a good reminder never to take "the way of the truth" for granted.

We talked to Jackie, back from the North. She really enjoyed her tour of York and loved Keith and Janet's house. We hope to see her before she sets off on her travels again.

Though nature, red in tooth and claw with ravine...

2011-11-01T13:02:00.000-07:00

Sep 24
It is a Tennyson blog today, given Captain B's "Stoatally" pictures. As Tennyson wrote (in "In Memoriam"):

"Man, her last work, who seem'd so fair,
Such splendid purpose in his eyes,
Who roll'd the psalm to wintry skies,
Who built him fanes of fruitless prayer,

Who trusted God was love indeed
And love Creation's final law-
Tho' Nature, red in tooth and claw
With ravine, shriek'd against his creed."

Tennyson is here equating Nature with the Creator - the Evolutionary view I suppose. Whereas nature is part of the creation. But it is a dilemma - something that always bothered me once I got old enough to think about it.

If God is good and all-powerful (as we were told in my faraway convent schooldays) why is nature so cruel?

I had no idea that all the time Genesis has been telling us, simply and clearly, that nature was not created red in tooth and claw.

"And God went on to say: “Here I have given to you all vegetation bearing seed which is on the surface of the whole earth and every tree on which there is the fruit of a tree bearing seed. To you let it serve as food. And to every wild beast of the earth and to every flying creature of the heavens and to everything moving upon the earth in which there is life as a soul I have given all green vegetation for food.” And it came to be so.
After that God saw everything he had made and, look! [it was] very good." - Genesis 1:29-31

This was a perfect world. It was Paradise. Nothing hunted, killed, or ate anything else.

And we are promised a return to that perfection. Isaiah 11:6-9 says:

"And the wolf will actually reside for a while with the male lamb, and with the kid the leopard itself will lie down, and the calf and the maned young lion and the well-fed animal all together; and a mere little boy will be leader over them. And the cow and the bear themselves will feed; together their young ones will lie down. And even the lion will eat straw just like the bull. And the sucking child will certainly play upon the hole of the cobra; and upon the light aperture of a poisonous snake will a weaned child actually put his own hand. They will not do any harm or cause any ruin in all my holy mountain; because the earth will certainly be filled with the knowledge of Jehovah as the waters are covering the very sea."

Even the lion will eat straw just like the bull.

When Tennyson wakes from the sleep of death, he will find himself in an earth that has been restored to Paradise.

We were out in one of the villages at the furthest limit of our territory today offering the knowledge of Jehovah to all who will listen. And after that I went back for a cup of tea and a very encouraging shepherding call. Lovely of the elders to take the time, given how busy they are. We had a Bethel speaker at the Hall tonight, followed by tea and cakes. He was talking about how close Jehovah is to every one of us.

High Tide

2011-11-01T12:55:00.001-07:00

Sep 9
Given that the storms on the Channel have already started, I thought it might be time for another poem I wrote years and years ago:

Hi! Tide

The sea had long wanted to go into town
So, early one morning, it roared in
Found the arcades still closed
And battered them down.

Obviously I very much hope The English Channel isn't reading this blog.

Went out with a young pioneer sister yesterday and we tackled some of our return visits. I didn't find any of mine in, but did find Dave on my magazine route at home, delivered the mags and had a brief chat. Went to the meeting last night and joined the small school as audience, as Audrey had a part.

I also got a part in October, in the big school, on the platform, with a microphone...

After the storm

2011-11-01T12:54:00.000-07:00

Sep 7
A much quieter day today - rain clouds kept threatening, but it stayed dry on the coast. Audrey and I managed an hour and a quarter on our magazine routes. And Col and I went to Swanbourne Lake during the afternoon. It was very quiet - and I bought some food for the birds, and we were mobbed.

This is the Arthur Rackham tree.

"Without a Map" by Meredith Hall

2011-11-01T12:45:00.000-07:00

Sep 5
This blog should have been called "A Murmuration of Starlings" - if only Col had managed to get a photo of the giant flock of starlings as it zoomed past our window, skidded to a halt on the green, and took off again like a rocket. If that is the little family - mum, dad and two generations of offspring - teenagers and toddlers - we used to see on the beach before we lived here, they have done well.

Didn't make it to the Field Service on Saturday - not at all well - feel very bad about it - but did manage to do a couple of answers to emails about the Bible. Got to the Meeting at the Hall on Sunday - lovely talk, of course. But still felt too bad to manage any calls after. So far my email witness continues at least.

Odd day here - one moment its sunny - the next its pelting down. We went to the supermarket this morning and loaded up with goods. Other than that it has been a cleaning, washing and ironing day, and I have done my studying. We are doing a close study of the Book of Acts, as we can learn so much from the way those earliest Christians witnessed.

Anyway I have called this blog "Without a Map", as a tribute to Meredith Hall's memoir which I have just read and re-read. I can't recommend it enough. I hope to write to her and say so.

She was forced to hand over her son for adoption in the Sixties - she was an unmarried schoolgirl mother - and mother and son did not see each other again for twenty one years. How they both dealt with what happened during that time is amazing, most especially in the case of her wonderful son.

Its upbuilding too, where it could have simply been a Misery Memoir.

So this blog is about families I suppose.

The Smell of Bracken

2011-11-01T12:41:00.000-07:00

Aug 31
We went for a walk in Rewell Woods yesterday - early evening. The heather was out and the air was full of the smell of bracken - which takes me back to my childhood picnics in the Derbyshire Dales.

Julia of Arabia arrived on Monday, in time for a sandwich lunch. And Jackie came over to join us for dinner - which I kept simple - a Cook's lasagne, salad, cheese and tiramisu (Lidl). We had a lovely evening and laughed a lot. And we caught up on the current news from ExpatWorld.

We walked along the River Arun in the afternoon - the Bramley Apple Walk. Julia left yesterday just before lunch. No apples as yet, but lots of blackberries.

I am taking Audrey out on the doors this morning. We have a few Not at Homes we can try to find At Home, and perhaps make a start on our September magazine deliveries.

Its the last day of Summer. And likely to be a cloudy and overcast day. I only hope that the Captain will be able to get out and about on butterfly business. Otherwise you may read about Hurricane Butterfly hitting the South Coast of England.

Watching the Weather

2011-11-01T12:35:00.000-07:00

Aug 26
Just sitting here watching the weather - and a flock of starlings flying along the seafront. I wonder if they are the same little starling family we used to see and feed on the riverfront when we first used to visit here. If so, they are thriving. Maggie and I are going out this morning if it isn't raining heavily. The Channel has gone very pale and flat, so I think some heavy rain may be on the way. If so, we will re-schedule.

But, if the weather permits, I will take her on her magazine route calls today. I didn't sleep too well last night for worrying about it, as I have to drive on the road with real big boy roundabouts on it. Plus it means going over the rail crossing at least twice.

And we have busy railway lines here in the Downland. I wonder if we will have trains when Paradise is restored?

I did a few return visits of my own yesterday, but only found two people at home.

The meeting at the Kingdom Hall last night was wonderful. But can I be a doer of the word - and not a forgetful hearer?

A Rainy Tuesday in Retirement

2011-11-01T12:31:00.000-07:00

Aug 24
I took Audrey to the Field Service group yesterday morning. The rain, which had been heavy overnight, stopped as we started on the doors and we had a good morning. We found quite a lot of people in from our Not At Home list, and we delivered the last of our August magazines. Audrey has given us a very pretty white geranium which Captain Greenfingers says may go on the orchid table.

We - El Capitano and his Mrs - spent the afternoon at Pagham harbour. It was a grey day, but that made all the greens and the white of the swans shine. We picked up fish and chips on the way back.

I am trying to think what I did on Monday... I did walk into town to try and find the cardigan Audrey wanted, but they didn't have it in her size.

I have just watched Total Wipeout - people falling off things into water and/or mud. Brilliant!

The Return of the Return of the House of Three Milks

2011-11-01T12:22:00.000-07:00

Aug 17
Once again we are the house of three milks. Girly goats milk and soy milk for me and Bea, and Big Boys milk (from the cow) for Captain B. Apparently the riots moved North last night, but London was comparatively calm. I really have seen "the increasing of lawlessness" the Bible warns about in my lifetime. Riots and looting on the streets of Manchester... Its a different world.

And I feel guilty that I won't be getting out on the doors with my Bible this week. People need to hear the truth so much.

David and Shirley joined us for lunch yesterday - chicken salad with some hot dishes - and we all seemed to have a good time. Dan and Gabi should be joining us tonight, if all goes to plan.

A Skein of Swans?

2011-08-14T12:34:00.000-07:00

A skein of somethings flew past our window this morning. Were they geese? Or were they swans? They came and went so suddenly. The early morning sky was still quite grey and cloudy and they shone white against it - so graceful and perfect.

Another reminder of Paradise - the Paradise the earth was always meant to be, and will be.

How beautifully Jehovah made it all.

A handy pile of chairs (not)

2011-08-13T02:42:00.000-07:00

The pile of chairs turned out to be an Important Sculpture, and I was just stopped in time from demolishing it and sitting on one. It was our trip to the Summer Exhibition at the Royal Academy again. Bea and Jacks were with us this year. It wasn't as packed as usual, I suppose because of the troubles in London.

Seeing this years Tracey Emins was very inspiring as they have given me an idea for an entry next year. I am planning a roughly torn old bit of paper with "This is obviously just what the selection committee is looking for" scrawled on it, and I shall sign it "Tracey Emin (not)", and then all of you who choose to go to the Exhib next year will be able to admire my work.

No sitting on it please!

It was fun though, as it always is. And there were some lovely paintings and photographs. See the Captain's Log for a couple of our favourites.

And there were two glowing vivid paintings by Stephen Chamber that made me want to buy a penthouse flat - overlooking the Thames - and decorate it round them.

Dan and Gabi left on Friday morning - wonderful they made it down and hopefully they will come again now they know where we are - and Tom, Jill and Jackie came for dinner last night. I made chile beef with a selection of small small things, and we started with Lidl's smoked salmon on brown bread. And finished with carrot cake and ice-cream. Bea left this morning for Brighton, Col chauffering. He took a packed lunch so I think he will be out there on the Downs for most of the day with his Captain Butterfly hat on.

Its strange now everybody has left. Its always melancholy saying goodbye to family.

I feel so tired I don't know what to do with myself, but don't have to do anything, beyond the washing and catching up with my studies.

The Return of the Return of the House of Three Milks

2011-08-09T23:12:00.000-07:00

Once again we are the house of three milks. Girly goats milk and soy milk for me and Bea, and Big Boys milk (from the cow) for Captain B. Apparently the riots moved North last night, but London was comparatively calm. I really have seen "the increasing of lawlessness" the Bible warns about in my lifetime. Riots and looting on the streets of Manchester... Its a different world.

And I feel guilty that I won't be getting out on the doors with my Bible this week. People need to hear the truth so much.

David and Shirley joined us for lunch yesterday - chicken salad with some hot dishes - and we all seemed to have a good time. Dan and Gabi should be joining us tonight, if all goes to plan.

A weekend

2011-08-07T23:04:00.000-07:00

Hard not to think this weekend - with parts of London burning and, apparently, looting going on in broad daylight - of the Bible's warning of the increasing lawlessness at "the time of the end". The end of this present system of things on the earth, not the end of the lovely earth itself.

And if we are heading for another financial crash as bad, or worse, as that of the great depression, that is going to trigger some awful things.

Where is all the money vanishing to?

Did it exist in the first place?

However this is supposed to be my internet diary not The Thoughts of Chairman Sue.

We had lunch with the cousins at Linda's on Saturday. She provided us with a wonderful lunch and some homemade chocolate cake to take home. It was delicious, thank you Linda. Sunday was the meeting at the Hall, with a talk about the importance of the witnessing work. And I did manage a couple of return visits on my way home. Then I did a load of washing and shopped.

Bea arrives today, David and Shirley for lunch tomorrow, Dan and Gabi tomorrow or Wednesday and Tom, Jill and Jackie for dinner on Friday. I am going to make chile as I can expand that depending on how many people are here then.

I sometimes think we should have bought a bigger place for retirement, as we have only two bedrooms.

A quiet day

2011-08-05T10:59:00.000-07:00

Though not for Captain B. I hardly saw him during the day. For me it was studying, dusting and polishing, doing two loads of washing, answering emails and climbing Paperwork Mountain of which I never seem to reach the top. Oh and I made us a vegetable soup for this evening.

Last night was the meeting at the Hall, which was wonderful as always. It was a hot sticky day, as if it was going to thunderstorm, and I noticed most of us were very tired. I had a blood test in the morning and a trip to the Opticians in the afternoon.

Is the world economic system finally imploding? How do people cope without knowing the truth? (Christianity is called "the way of the truth".)

The congregations worldwide are studying the Book of Acts at the moment, and the Book of Psalms. And this week we reached Psalm 90.

"In themselves the days of our years are seventy years;
And if because of special mightiness they are eighty years,
Yet their insistence is on trouble and hurtful things;
For it must quickly pass by, and away we fly. "

And how quickly it does fly by. A year hardly seems to last a month these days. If I make my threescore years and ten, I have 6 more Autumns ahead of me.

However, the Psalmist also shows us what we must do.

"Show [us] just how to count our days in such a way
That we may bring a heart of wisdom in."

If Jehovah remembers us we will live again, with Autumns "to time indefinite" ahead of us. So it is wise to let ourselves by taught by Him.

The Tuesday field service

2011-08-02T12:20:00.000-07:00

Audrey and I shopped first and then went to the Group and then on to do some of our August magazine route. Its better to do many of mine at a weekend when I can find them in, but it looks like a busy month with lots of visitors so I thought I had better get them delivered asap. We did find two people at home, and they were welcoming and glad to have the magazines.

I am highlighting the Learn From God'sWord article in The Watchtower this month, as it includes this question: Why do so many religions claim to be Christian?

We heard from Dave and Maggie today - they plan to visit the UK - first time in 4 years - so we hope we will be seeing them. We still have some of their stuff here, including two coats. They ask if we want anything bringing from Bangkok, but we can't think of anything. A crate of wonderful Thai mangoes would be nice, but hardly reasonable.

Didn't seem to do a lot yesterday beyond housework and studying.

Dinner at Jackies

2011-07-30T12:02:00.000-07:00

We had a lovely roast chicken dinner at Jackie's last night - lots to catch up on as we don't seem to have seen each other for ages. El Capitano was off again searching for the Misper ("missing person" to us civilians). She was found, thank goodness, sometime this afternoon, though not by the Captain himself.

Jean and I did an hour and a half on the doors this morning - in a caravan park - lovely gardens - one gentleman gave us a tour of his beautiful garden, but sadly did not want to hear about the Paradise the whole earth is to become.

Then it was Hall Cleaning... but I felt a bit redundant this time, as all I did was half of the dusting - quite a few sisters turned out. It shouldn't be the turn of our field service group again till next year.

The Motor Fair is roaring away on the green.

Ann of the Cape skyped with some interesting Biblical questions which I hope to tackle tomorrow. We had a good talk. I wish she lived here. It was so nice when we lived in the same town.

And it was lovely when me and my siblings were all young married and we all lived in our Northern hometown...

More Sad News

2011-07-27T11:01:00.000-07:00

We got the sad news today that a friend of ours from Expatland has died. He was the same age as me. Ralph was American - a lovely person. And he was one of the ones responsible for giving us such an excellent library.

Now we must write to his wife in France... What can we say about such a loss for her?

I was remembering his dog Max - a very fierce Alsatian. He adored Ralph and Mrs R. but not only had no time for anybody else, but was quite fierce about his dislike. I was The Lady who Ran the Boarding Kennels for some years, and Young Master Max stayed with us now and again. He was a very intelligent dog and would tolerate the guys who worked in the back. He never bit them. But he had no time for me, and I got a warning "I mean business lady" growl if I got too close.

One day as I was rushing out the back door into the yard on some urgent errand, I bumped into Max who was on his walkies. His walker gave a gasp of horror - as did I - but Max just gave me a cold look and walked on by.

He did not bite me.

He has accepted me at last, I thought, I am now a piece of the Kennel Club furniture. So to celebrate, when I did my morning rounds with the doggie treats, I offered him some (I usually stayed well away). Sadly, he growled and made it clear that he did not talk to the furniture.

However, he did not bite me, and he well could have done, given I ran right into him.

He was one of only two dogs who stayed at my Doggie Hotel who was completely unbribeable, refusing all my offers of doggie biscuits and suchlike.

I am glad that Ralph outlived him, as I don't think Max could have lived without Ralph.

The Channel is calm today. There are some new pink geraniums on our balcony. The earth is so lovely. And I hope that Ralph is sleeping safe in "the everlasting arms" and will wake up and see this beautiful world again, when the time comes.

Is there any chance we can be re-united with the pets we have loved and who loved us?

That is something to leave safe in Jehovah's hands too.

After all, if we loved them, He loved them even more.

Anyway, this is supposed to be my diary so what have we been doing? Not a lot. Getting slowly back into routine after the Convention - and coping with the side effects of being back on the new medication. Audrey and were out on the field service yesterday. We were calling on not-at-homes, and we also did a couple of return visits. Otherwise it has been some shopping and housework and studying. Its Hall Cleaning on Saturday - it was to have been Thursday, but we have swapped this week - its the meeting tomorrow - Maggie will be there. I called in for coffee with her on Tuesday and gave her the new releases from the Convention, together with a programme.

Back from Brighton

2011-07-24T12:15:00.000-07:00

One day you are a young married and the next you are in the "Special Needs" section at the Convention. And very grateful for it too. Ken, Jean and I found good seats and were able to order our lunch and even had tea and coffee bought to us. It was so helpful - thank you very very much, young brothers and sisters.

And, as we always say, the Convention was the best ever. But, as they are getting better and better, we are always right in so saying.

The theme this year was: "Let God's Kingdom Come!".

The opening talk was: "Why We Need God's Kingdom To Come." (If you aren't sure, watch the News. And also think how short a time it is from being one of the young marrieds to being one of the Zimmer set.)

The closing address was: "God's Kingdom Will Crush All Other Kingdoms - When?"

We can't know exactly when. Even Jesus didn't know when he was on the earth. He may well know now of course, as he is The Rider on the White Horse, riding out to complete his conquest. But we can know the signs of the times, as the Bible tells us.

This talk was specifically about the march of the world powers as set out in the prophetic Book of Daniel.

And - just as I had given up hope of Part 2 of the DVD, in the very last talk the Speaker told us that the second part of "Jehovah's Witnesses, Faith in Action" has been released. Its called "Let the Light Shine".

We all got our DVDs at the end of the Convention and they let me have an extra one for a sister who is at home recovering from an operation.

Now I have to try and decipher the two notebooks I took with me. Either twelve spiders got very drunk, fell into a vat of ink, and staggered all over the pages. Or I took notes.

Attercliffe of Bangkok

2011-07-21T11:45:00.000-07:00

Another poem I wrote many years ago.

Attercliffe of Bangkok

by me

Banana palms fruiting

machinery chugging

behind corrugated fences

Coconuts lying un needed

on the grass

Helicopters

bright butterflies

clear blue skies

A long wait for the Sheik

who talks and talks

Hours go by

In the grassy dark of palms

the thin white cat

eats duck I bought.

Audrey and I went on the field service Tuesday morning, after a shopping trip - to the pet shop - food for the birds - which reminds me that another pigeon has taken to sitting on our balcony railings. Which causes me, typing peacefully away, to be terror struck by a sudden ROAR of GET OFF MY BALCONY!! from Himself. The pigeon sits there calmly - flying slowly off at the last minute (a second before the foaming Captain Butterfly reaches it) - while I flap round the room in a panic and knock myself out trying to fly through the mirror.

Blood test this morning. New med no fun. Ken and Jean will pick me up at 7 for the Brighton Convention.

Julia of Arabia

2011-07-18T00:33:00.000-07:00

The walking stick is still missing. We need a Jane Marple to sort this one out.

Funny weather over the weekend - heavy rain showers and sunshine with that wonderful light that usually means a rainbow somewhere. The nearer I get to leaving it, the more I love and appreciate the beauty of the world - and I so much want to live here forever - to "inherit the earth" as Jesus promised.

Captain Butterfly has had his Rescue hat on - and has been on a course. I am not feeling wonderful on this new medication. Jean, Ken and I have made our travel plans for Brighton next weekend. And Jean and i were out on the doors on Saturday, but we only lasted half an hour as we were soaked to the skin by then, even though we were doing return visits. And we weren't sure that having a couple of drowned rats turning up on your doorstep would be very encouraging.

I managed some return visits yesterday and had a nice conversation with a young girl I have been leaving the magazines with for some months now. She works shifts, so I usually put them through her letterbox. I hoped I might find her in at Sunday lunchtime and I did.

Tom won The Apprentice! The nice guy came first.

We heard from Julia of Arabia and she hopes to come and stay with us in September. It will be great to see her.

Pete sent me his next chapter to comment on, which I have done. It is a wonderful evocation of Fifties England and, while he will have to cut and re-shape for publication, he must keep what he has written as a valuable time-machine.

It was a time of great hope for a brave new world.

And people really did try, but we are up against the fact that "it does not belong to man who is walking even to direct his step". And, cut off from our Creator as we are, we cannot thrive on our own.

And so we - the children of Adam - started our new millenium by re-starting the Crusades.

The Mystery of the Missing Walking Stick

2011-07-15T07:00:00.000-07:00

We went to Goodwood - not for the races - but to look for Captain B's walking stick. When we got there he remembered where he had left it. Not at Goodwood. But it was a lovely drive. And we stopped at Brandy Hole Copse on the way back. The butterflies were out in force - see The Captain's Log - and he also took some shots of the summer meadow.

It all reminded me how nice it is to be able to spend time together in the week - like going back to our Uni courting days.

I gave my talk at the Ministry School last night. Jan was a wonderful householder and we got through it on time. And i managed to work completely without a script - for the first time I think. That is because I kept it very simple.

Charles had a chat with me afterwards and told me what speech quality I am to work on next time.

In a summer meadow

2011-07-14T03:03:00.000-07:00

We were in a summer meadow on beautiful Kithurst Hill yesterday. So I decided to find a couple of poems I wrote many years ago about summer and inflict - er - privilege my blog readers with them.

Marbled White

SUMMER, SHEFFIELD

by me

Summer comes to Sheffield

And greens the thick ribbon of trees

That ties the stone villages of the city.

Daisies dance on Dore lawns

Botanical gardens bloom

Round Ringinglow

Heather moorland hums with bees.

And by contrast:

SUMMER in ARABY 115 degrees

by me

I feel like a piece of toast

A barbecue roast

A restaurant broast

This heat is the uttermost.

Took Audrey shopping on Tuesday and we went out on the field service. Then I went to Beryls to meet her and Jannett so we could practise for my part in the School tonight. Aargh. I will be glad when its done. Its 3 years since I appeared in the Ministry School.

Before that, Col, Ronald and I have to clean the Kingdom Hall. And the poor Captain was called out at 1.15 this morning on an urgent search - people rescue, not whale rescue this time.

The Butterfly from Mars

2011-07-12T11:39:00.000-07:00

Blue fur!

Captain B had a very successful butterfly day. I studied and did housework - dusting, polishing, washing clothes - the Monday routine.

It was the Meeting at the Kingdom Hall yesterday morning. And I am feeling very guilty as I did not go on the work afterwards as I intended. There was a lot of business to see to after the meeting - and Joyce was visiting again. So I drove her back to her sister's flat.

And somehow after i had done all that it was lunchtime and I went home. And I think I slept quite a lot in the afternoon.

I should be able to get out more this weekend though as Capt B will hardly be around he has so much in his calendar.

Jean rang re our plans for the Brighton Convention - Ken is going to take us on the Friday. Jacks rang re meeting up for supper, but we can't at the moment synchronise our calendars - this week is so full.

Life as you get older... there was an article in ...(?) The Mail online (possibly) about the diffculties of dating when you are over fifty. I am wondering if you should want to be dating - even if you are single. It sounds so teenage, and was rather a fraught business as i remember it.

Baking - and a request to Captain B

2011-07-09T13:08:00.000-07:00

We worked on the doors this morning - over and over with two brothers. We had one interesting conversation and can go back. It is our month to clean the Hall again! Time is hurtling along, faster and faster. Ronald and I will do the cleaning on Thursday after the Field Service group, with Captain Butterfly, IF he is free and agreeable to help.

It will be a busy week. Jan and I meet up Tuesday to practise our part in the school on Thursday - my first appearance in the school since I left the land of expats. Plus the field service - I have to remind myself to pick up Audrey. And it seems as if I will hardly see Captain B - his week is stuffed to the gills.

Aunt Margaret's funeral is this week.

Got an email from Peter thanking me for the crit of the first Chapter of his memoirs, which re-creates the world of our Fifties childhood with startling vividness.

I made a cake this afternoon as a present for El Capitano. It was our 38th Wedding Anniversary on Thursday and we weren't able to celebrate as we were at the hospital all morning and I was at the Hall in the evening. It is a date cake - a Delia Smith recipe - so a reminder of all our years in Expatland too.

The deeper and deeper levels of corruption being revealed in "the world" every day are shocking. And frightening. But not surprising to anyone who has paid attention to the warning from our Creator that, for the moment, "the whole world" is lying in the power of "the wicked one" - Satan the devil.

And he is also called "the father of the lie".

But not for too much longer. We are heading towards "the land of straightforwardness".

For Free Chocolate Cake...

2011-07-08T01:01:00.000-07:00

Now that you have been tempted into my blog I can reveal:
(a) that the doors are now locked
and
(b) that the full title of this blog is "For Free Chocolate Cake Look Somewhere Else".

Sorry. But I need an audience for my poem. Its quite short so don't panic.

I sent it off (many years ago) to a competition run by a magazine that was being edited by Auberon Waugh. I suppose it could have been The Oldie. He wanted some more Mrs.Ravoon adventures - see:
http://adjectivemarcus.livejournal.com/294239.html

So I wondered where the scary lady had come from. And wrote this:

MRS RAVOON

The ship has returned
From the alien star
Captain and crew
Who knows where they are?
Nothing inside
But a large silk cocoon
In which form the features of
MRS RAVOON

I didn't win.

It is a wild and stormy morning with waves building up on The Channel. It should be a quiet day today - study - paperwork - housework - telly watching.

Second day into new medicine... strong stuff... apprehensive... will it turn me into MRS RAVOON!

Walking with The Captain

2011-07-07T04:07:00.000-07:00

We have had two walks this week - Iping Common and Pagham Harbour.

Iping Common is a lovely bit of heathland - reminding me of how much of my childhood was spent on the Yorkshire and Derbyshire Moorland. And I am always wuthering on about it.

It was a perfect summer afternoon at Pagham with a wonderful light on everything. Captain Camera took a shot of the water for my blog.

Today it was a hospital appointment for me, and a start on my new arthritis medicine. I am now waiting for the side effects to hit.

Aunts

2011-07-05T04:02:00.000-07:00

We got the sad news yesterday that Aunt Margaret has died. Soon there will be no-one left who remembers the wonderful Grannyworld of Nabbs cottage. When I was a child it seemed as if it had always been there, and always would be there.

But, one by one, we are all going over the edge.

Captain B has taken a wonderful outer space shot in the Downland. It looks like at any moment Dr.Who and team will turn up to save the caterpillars from the crab spider.

But who knows, perhaps in outer space, its the other way round. Though I think those caterpillars will be alright either way, as their coats signal like mad "I'm poisonous, don't eat me!!"

Audrey and I were out this morning. We started my magazine route calls and delivered most of my invitations to the upcoming Convention in Brighton. It was very hot in the car, but there was a refreshing sea breeze outside.

The Men's Final and a perfect summer evening

2011-07-03T23:37:00.000-07:00

We watched Novak Djokovic beat Rafael Nadal, in four sets. Which is amazing. Two great players. And, at moments, possibly some of the best tennis ever seen in a Wimbledon final?

We used to watch Wimbledon when I was a child. My mother loved it. We would come home from school and there would be a salad tea ready, with strawberries and cream, or more usually milk, which was fine. I still prefer my strawberries with milk or yoghourt.

And we would all watch the current match. It seemed more magical then. I don't know whether that is simply because I am older and tireder, or because there is so much money in the game now - money and fame.

It had a charm about it too that it doesn't seem to have now.

Col was off butterflying (see The Captain's Log), while I went to the meeting at the Kingdom Hall - being taught the word of Jehovah - and then went on to visit Maggie who is still convalescing. Jen was there. Then I rushed back, via the supermarket - for the obligatory strawberries - to watch the Final.

We - Capt.B, Jacks and myself - went to Tom and Jill's for supper on Saturday. Roast lamb and a strawberry pastry. Jill is a wonderful cook. And we had champagne - before supper - in their walled garden. A perfect summer evening. Or as perfect as you can get until the earth is transformed under the rulership of the Kingdom of God.

And I got a lovely email from a guy on my magazine route.

A July day in retirement.

2011-07-01T13:14:00.000-07:00

The 1st of July already. And a sunny one too. It was always such a happy month when I was a child as it was almost school-free - and it seemed to last forever - with August - also school-free - to come.

I hope it will be a happy month now, but this time I know it won't last very long.

Anne of the Cape rang me yesterday and we had a long chat. She is full of interesting questions as ever, which I am in the process of trying to answer by email.

Captain B left on butterfly safari but came back in time to watch Our Gallant Scottish Lad Andy Murray being beaten in the semi-finals at Wimbledon by Rafael Nadal. Rafael Nadal played better than him - a cunning tactic that was shockingly successful.

I shopped, posted the June Watchtower to the guy at the fortress flats. Unless I catch him at home (and he works shifts) I can't get in, or anywhere near his letter box. And I got chicken and salad and strawberries so we could lunch in front of the box. Jean rang to update me on the mysterious lady who asked us to call and to make arrangements for us to work together tomorrow.

And we got a postcard from Linda and Nick in France.

Biscuits

2011-06-29T14:10:00.000-07:00

We just watched The Apprentice. It was the first task I have ever felt able to do. Usually I haven't a clue. You would have needed to start with a great tasting biscuit and offer one each to the buyers before saying anything. If they liked it, the battle would be almost won.

It was a disaster for one team which sold nothing. But the team with Helen on won - as it always does - with one massive order.

The Gang of Three (as Maggie is still convalescing) came round for a coffee this morning - and we watched "Out of Darkness". A lovely morning.

Col was off at Oaken Wood - see his blog. He has a great Ringlet photo.

It was a housework afternoon - making cherry crumble out of the whole cherry orchard that Col had picked. And doing a great load of ironing.

Audrey and I were out on the doors yesterday.

Norman in Concert

2011-06-27T06:52:00.000-07:00

We went to Norman and the Band's concert on Saturday night - just a walk across the Green - and we went down to the sea in the interval.

They played both Tuxedo Junction and In The Mood. And a piece called "Amelia" that Norman had written for his granddaughter. It was beautiful. I hope it might become a regular part of their concerts.

IF I get to be in the earthly Paradise, with life "to time indefinite" stretching before me, will I be able to play a musical instrument? Will I be able to sing?

It seems likely, as if I am there, I will be perfect. So my ears will be perfectly tuned and my vocal cords will work perfectly.

It was the meeting at the Kingdom Hall on Sunday morning and afterwards Jean and I did a couple of return visits. Captain Butterfly was marshalling in Brighton - people, not butterflies.

How did Helicopters Evolve?

2011-06-25T07:03:00.000-07:00

Its Armed Forces Day and we have been watching a Royal Navy helicopter on the green outside our flat. Us - and every small boy in town. It was impressive - especially when it came some feet off the ground and just stayed there.

It then set off down the coast - without strafing us - and came back and did some appalling things over the sea. It seemed to fly straight down into the sea, then roared straight up again - just in time. Brilliant flying.

What an amazing machine it was - a marvel of engineering and design.

And yet when we see a dragonfly - infinitely more beautiful and complex - we are told to believe that it just evolved.

Jean and I talked about the complexity and the beauty of the creation this morning to a gentleman we met on the doors. He did take a Creation brochure and assured us he would read it, although he said he did not want us to call back.

I lost my field service group this morning! Or rather I couldn't find them. We were meeting at a different house and I couldn't find it. So I decided to do some return visits and for some strange reason turned down a road I usually avoid - too many parked cars - and found my group. They were working that road, so I joined up with Jean and off we went.

We went up to London on Thursday to meet Bob and Judy - friends from our University days - and we lunched at The Royal Albert Hall. A first. Nice that you can go on having firsts, even when you are retired.

It was a lovely summer day - blue sky, scudding white clouds, big trees in their full green, girls in their summer dresses. And of course yet another generation of young girls to be waitresses in London's various coffee bars and cafes. I waited myself in my time.

Jackie came round for supper yesterday. I cooked that reliable chile beef recipe that I learnt many years ago in a Tex Mex Cookery class in Expatland. And we had it with small small things (yoghurt, grated cheese, corn salad). I ought to start making cornbread again. And of course strawberrries and cream for afters.

Its the Concert tonight.

Dorothy's Detective Agency

2011-06-21T09:29:00.000-07:00

Audrey and I did an hour on the door to door work this morning, then I dropped her off, and went back to the lady who is worried about her cousin in Christchurch. I asked Dorothy to help and within a day she had found the family and the news about them - some good, some bad. So I was able to take the information round this morning. The lady and her husband were really pleased and I came away with a punnet of fresh garden picked raspberries as a thank you.

Not one of them was hurt in the earthquakes that have struck S.Island though.

I also placed two magazines at The Vicarage. Which was a nice surprise.

I can't think I did anything much yesterday, beyond a big shop, some cooking and some studying.

Except that I did read Jan Karski's "Secret State". It is completely harrowing, but I promised Jean I would read it so I did. Its pretty unputdownable though.

What that generation went through! And how stoical they were about it all.

The Long and Winding Road

2011-06-18T11:38:00.000-07:00

Jane and I worked on a long and winding country road this morning - long drives - much green space. But we found most people at home and had one or two good calls. One gate we came to had a fierce netting of wire with a serious looking BEWARE OF THE DOG sign on it. We shook the gate a bit and as no dog appeared or barked we tiptoed in and up the drive. "You're brave, coming in here" said the owner. Although, as I said, we did check first. We saw the Hound of the Baskervilles through the hall window and certainly would not have gone in had it been loose in the garden. He (the householder, not the hound) most definitely wasn't interested, but we had a pleasant chat, and he assured us he wouldn't loose the dog till we made it to the gate.

Jane left me at the shops so I was able to get some strawberries for our tea and walk back.

Audrey and I went out yesterday morning - then Linda came for lunch - and we went to Jackie's for supper.

Spoke to Maggie - the op is done and she is back home. It was more painful than last time, but seems to have been a success, and she said she slept very well last night.

Its strange for me at meetings without Maggie as we always sit together. It used to be Don, Maggie and me, but Don died the year after we got back.

A busy week

2011-06-17T09:12:00.000-07:00

The Marbled White (see above) is one of my favourite butterflies. Photo courtesy of Captain Butterfly himself.

Dentist yesterday morning - all OK till next check up - though I had to have some painful scrapings. Then I cooked the chicken for Linda's lunch today - Captain B has since eaten quite a lot of it. Field service with Louise in the afternoon - off into the wilds of East Preston to find the flat where we were all meeting - found flat! - Louise's directions worked - she had even explained where to park. Went out. And not only did we find quite a lot in from the Not At Homes, but I finally found the lady I had spoken to nearly 3 years ago!

We had quite a good chat about what we are praying for when we ask for God's Kingdom to come, and I left her with "What Does the Bible Really Teach?"

I now have to try and find her at home again.

Was so amazed by that that I forgot to add another Bible Teach book to my witnessing bag.

I picked up Audrey this morning and we managed 45 minutes doing return visits. I now have a commission from a lady at the door to try to find out what has happened to a specific street in Christchurch. There have just been more earthquakes - terrible damage apparently - and she can't contact her relatives there. So I have to call back there to let her know if I have found out anything.

Earthquakes, in one place after the other. Everything is being shaken now, including the current system of things.

The Circuit Overseer and the Clouded Yellow

2011-06-15T12:37:00.000-07:00

The C.O. visit started last night. His first talk to us had, as he said, the longest title yet:

"Help People Become Reconciled to God, Zealously Persevere in your Efforts."

The speaker started by referring us to Revelation 7:1 to 10 with its vivid image of the four angels holding back "the winds of destruction" until the 144,000 annointed ones have been sealed, and "the great crowd" has been gathered in. The great crowd "keep on" witnessing - persevering to the end.

And that is the point. We mustn't let anything rob us of our joy or make us lose our zeal for trying to reach everyone with the Kingdom good news.

Audrey and I got out on the doors yesterday morning - with Maggie and a very young sister who is still in the middle of her school exams. So I had an extra precious cargo in my car and prayed a lot to Jehovah to protect my driving. And thanks to that I got everyone there and back safely.

We - El Capitano and myself - went to David's this morning to see his butterfly collection. He has an amazing collection of Clouded Yellows. The beauty and variety of the creation seems endless. Although I am sad to note that people do still kill and pin butterflies.

I know there is a science side to this - and that they do have to be classified and examined. And David's collection is exact and labelled and beautifully done - better probably than most museums manage.

And that we do eat meat and fish sometimes. And that loads of insects die on the windscreen of our car.

But each one is a precious and exquisite little life.

Well, Paradise is not restored yet. Nature is still "red in tooth and claw with ravine". But the Bible assures us that it was not created that way, and that it will not stay that way.

At Cissbury Ring

2011-06-13T11:13:00.000-07:00

It was a perfect summer day today - blue skies, scudding clouds, - and we spent the afternoon on Cissbury Ring. We met up with Neil - also out hunting for the...? see the Captain's Log for the name of the creature.

Maggie and I were out all morning doing our magazine routes. Its great spending time together in the preaching work. And we found quite a few at home. I had an appointment with the Lung Lady after lunch - all seems OK - and if my tests continue to be so, she will only need to see me every year from now on.

I still wonder at ending up here, in the chalky downlands, flint shining everywhere, stepping over the "close bit thyme" of the Kipling poem, "Sussex".

I think I will quote a line or two now:

We have no waters to delight
Our broad and brookless vales--
Only the dewpond on the height
Unfed, that never fails--
Whereby no tattered herbage tells
Which way the season flies--
Only our close-bit thyme that smells
Like dawn in Paradise.

Like dawn in Paradise

A stormy day

2011-06-12T12:22:00.000-07:00

It has been raining all day - with high winds - and a stormy English Channel. The balcony flowers are blowing about.

Jean and I managed two hours on the door to door preaching work yesterday. I couldn't have done that without my injection - thank you the Hospital. We found quite a few at home and have a lot of return visits to do.

Jean loved my father's poem. She said it made her cry. And she could see it was like hearing him speak.

This is going to be a busy week as its the Circuit Overseers visit. I hope to be out on the doors every day apart from Friday. We have an extra meeting on the Tuesday night, and several special talks from the C.O.

This gives a great feeling of being cared for - of how Jehovah looks after his people. How would I be feeling now if I hadn't been taught what the Bible says? What hope would I have?

Captain B and I are just looking out over the wonderful waves on the Channel. The speak of the dynamic energy of their Creator.

The Jawbone Gang

2011-06-10T12:27:00.000-07:00

The Jawbone Gang, by Penny Grubb, published by Robert Hale, had its London launch yesterday. Pen gave us another funny and informative speech and reading, and ALCS hosted it as brilliantly as usual.

We - Captain B, Jacks and me - arrived (via train and tube) just on time.

Danny and Gabi came so it was a chance to catch up with them - they hope to get down here for a weekend by the sea at some stage.

I am wondering if we will have another summer full of visitors like last year, or not.

Things I must do today are to shop, return or renew my library books, and study. And Col has his Butterfly Transect to do. He assures me he is just counting them, not actually transecting them.

Thank goodness that the Victorian passion for killing them and pinning them to things has gone out of fashion. What was the impulse that made people want to kill something beautiful as soon as they saw it?

Jacks and I spent the train journey back doing the Crossword in the free newspaper and having a sort of fugue(? if that is the right word) about what happens as you get older. We realised that the news in Christmas cards and letters now tends towards the "and John had his second bypass this year", "and sadly Mary's Alzheimers is worse" area.

And then we sit there realising that we can't remember who John and Mary are.

Aaaarrrgh

Anyway, a great launch and a mini family reunion.

Rain!

2011-06-09T01:28:00.000-07:00

We had a heavy shower of rain this morning - badly needed. I don't know if its enough to signal to the clever grass on our green that its safe to start greening up again. We shall see. Maybe it can tell if there is more on the way?

I was so pleased to see a tiny 3 minute snippet on the telly last night about Evolution/Creation, with a Scottish scientist, a Dr.Noble, saying that while Natural Selection and Gene Mutations certainly played a part in the variety of life, the evidence for design is very strong.

And where there is design, there has to be a Designer.

“Raise your eyes high up and see. Who has created these things? It is the One who is bringing forth the army of them even by number, all of whom he calls even by name. Due to the abundance of dynamic energy, he also being vigorous in power, not one [of them] is missing... Have you not come to know or have you not heard? Jehovah, the Creator of the extremities of the earth, is a God to time indefinite. He does not tire out or grow weary. There is no searching out of his understanding." - Isaiah 40:26-28

I wish that Captain Butterfly had been there to hear it, but he was out at his Treasure Hunters meeting.

I have a horrible feeling that I didn't do much of anything yesterday. The Channel was so beautiful, it was like being in The Maldives and looking out on the turquoise Indian Ocean. It sparkled and gleam in various shades of blue and turquoise - and was covered in waves of a fluorescent whiteness.

I did study and make us a vegetable fried rice for our lunch. With organic brown rice too.

The Zimmer Twins

2011-06-07T05:21:00.000-07:00

Audrey and I were out on the doors this morning doing magazine deliveries. A lot of complicated driving and not many magazines delivered sadly. However, we had one very good talk on the doorsteps with a lady I have been calling on for a while, and we can go back.

We started our day in Zimmer-twin fashion as Audrey got her seatbelt stuck in the door of her car and we could neither extract it nor get the door open. Thankfully a passing hero - a Sir Walter Raleigh style gentleman with strong hands - came to our rescue and extracted us.

I got back to find that Captain Butterfly has taken himself off to Somerset in search of LARGE Blues. He did ring when I was having my lunch but it didn't get much beyond "Hello, I'm in Somerset. There's one now!!! (sounds as of camera being wielded to a giant rushing of wings) - Bye"

I am trying to think what on earth I did yesterday. I must have done something... Richard, our Financial Advisor, came round in the morning. We haven't seen him since our Expat days. It was like old times to have cups of tea and a chat with him. We were saying how sorry we were to see the destruction of the lovely Pearl Roundabout in Bahrain. It was my favourite piece of modern civic statuary.

Its a lovely island, but not Paradise, anymore than anywhere else is at the moment. The News is scarier all the time, and Mick took care to remind us at the group this morning what good news we have for people.

And Col and i went to the Farm Shop and stocked up with honey and strawberries and things.

A Sunday in Retirement

2011-06-05T11:12:00.000-07:00

Went to the Hall this morning - increased my Watchtower order, gave Jean the poem I promised her and failed to hand in my not at homes as the brother with the map we were working Saturday morning has gone on holiday.

Jean and I did about an hour and twenty minutes yesterday morning. We had to work a big block of flats, all by intercom, which is not easy. But it was a great morning out. We had some good conversations that we hope to go back on.

As Captain B was out butterflying I went to Jean's for a coffee afterwards.

We have had some rain today! But not nearly enough as my father - country boy and gardener - would say were he here.

Its his poem I have given to Jean. Its the only poem he ever wrote as far as we know. Its about the last time he saw his mother - before the war and then the iron curtain came between them.

A Zimmer Designed by Q

2011-06-03T07:52:00.000-07:00

We spent yesterday morning at the hospital - mostly waiting for a blood test - as I got an appointment with my lovely arthritis doctor and got my emergency injection. An injection that I always want to call 'silicon', but is, I believe 'steroid'.

It had the effect of making me feel quite ill for the rest of the day, but it has very much improved my walking. I could almost have been said to have sprung out of bed this morning. Almost.

When the phone call telling me I am the next Bond girl finally comes I will book up for the silicon injections. And pop down to the Lab so Q can provide me with my specially designed zimmer frame, on which I shall hurtle about chasing (or escaping from) all the baddies.

I'm not sure if they are going to call the next James Bond: "For Your Eyes Only" or "The Casting Director Should Have Gone to Specsavers".

I had intended to spend yesterday cooking for Jacks tonight, but instead spent this morning shopping (thank you Cooks of Rustington) and now hope to provide homemade (tho not by me) chicken casserole, followed by a small cheeseboard and strawberries and cream.